Forget you not

About domestic abuse

the late night fights, no matter who's right or wrong, i still haven't grown accustomed to waking with the lights on and you upset again. back in the day i'm questioning when i was like how could you? you knew what you were doing while i was caught up in the woodwork, exhausting the last lost breath from a cork and cocking back the bottle this dinner won't need a fork. i'll pass out with meal in hand another night lost another morning it hurts to stand. another night stomach's getting caught in the stirrups, another sticky mouth morning wishing it was pancakes and some syrup, cuz i'm writing these blues and struggling for some greens, and had written 5 chapters before passing out with an afternoon of wishing it was more serene in my head. fed myself the afterhours, partied out naked and nervous in downtown, this night should have been insight for a public service announcement, but p.b.s. was off broadcast and i had casted into seas rainbow flaked and shallow, lost and dreaming in skeleton gallows an elegant shadow hellbent on time spent writing letters, but even with four pockets full of verbs and words i still could'nt bind them together. so i'm stuck here unable to enjoy this a.m. weather, binging on the philosophies of the marlboro man with his bare a*s black leather chaps lasso tickling whipcracks at my full flavored five o'clock shadow lungs, my mouth lunging for substance but stuck with a splintered tongue. bedroom doors undone with the weight of your rage, laying on the floor in wonder of how i let you cage me. the fists and nails, the fits and arms flailing out to tear down my sails and keep me from crushing these waves and leaving you. i promise i'll never grieve for you.