Goodbye. For now.

Not a story about zombies I promise

Goodbyes are not forever.

Goodbyes are not the end.

They simply mean I’ll miss you

Until we meet again.

- Unknown

Falling From Hell

Trap me in a cage

Kill all of those

whom I have loved.

Take away everything

Strip me down

and beat me

until I am nothing.

Steal from me

Tie me to a chair

and whip me until

I speak

But be warned

for when I speak

There will be no

relief to you.

You have told me

that I have fallen

as far as I can

yet, I am still

plummeting

You cannot see

me truly fall

as my mind can

fall forever

I can always fall

to a worse place

If you wish to see

just close your eyes

watch as you begin

to fall further

My friend, do you not see

There is no such thing as torture because

You can always

fall

From Hell

- Love,

Dec. Mason

* * * * *

God, this is dark, I thought, whoever wrote this must have a talent for writing about the human psyche. I don’t know what this was doing in my mail but I know that this is a strange poem and that I should probably be concerned. Who knows? The guy might have just sent this to the wrong address, it says love after all, so he probably sent this to an ex of some sort to try and talk to them. It’s not much of a love poem though, either way I’m not going to get worked up for nothing.

I folded up the poem and put it on my desk, I liked the poem, it was depressing, but good. I wasn’t going to freak about one letter, I wasn’t going to lose my head. I needed to go to sleep, I hadn’t slept well in so long and I needed to go to bed and actually sleep for once. Staying awake until three in the morning every night wasn’t going to change anything, neither was going to bed at ten at night, but at least I wouldn’t be so tired, not physically at least. I grabbed my phone, and started playing some music to try and calm me down before I tried to go to sleep. I listened to music for about twenty minutes while I got ready for bed before I finally turned it off and turned of my light. I lied down in my bed and wrapped myself up in covers, I stared at my ceiling waiting for sleep to come but it wouldn’t. I rolled onto my side and closed my eyes, once again sleep never came. I was so tired, I needed to sleep instead of stay up and reminisce about the same things over and over again. Eventually sleep did come, but not before I had cried and tossed and turned for about twenty more minutes. I didn’t care about that, all I wanted was to sleep the world away.

* * * * *

Over the next few days I spent all of my time in the house like I normally did. It was summer so I didn’t have to leave to go to school or anything like that. I was in my room like always when my mother came in and gave me an envelope that had been addressed to me. She didn’t say anything, she never usually did. I waited for her to leave before I tore open the letter only to find another poem, this time with a letter attached.

Truths

Takes away the pain when

nothing else can.

You’re lying

through your teeth.

You don’t understand.

Neither do you

I need to do this.

No you don’t.

It lets the pain disappear.

No, it doesn’t

You’re wrong

You’re crazy

I deserve every cut

You don’t

My body is worthless

Your body is healthy

I’m a waste of air

You are destroying yourself

I know I am

Then why do you keep doing this

I need to

No you don’t

Just let it go

I would if I believed you wanted me to

I do want you to just

leave me alone

You are crying out for help you think you don’t deserve

No I’m not

You are, now hand over the blade

I need it

You don’t, now give it to me

If you want it

take it

I won’t take it by force

Then I guess the blade is

mine

Fine destroy yourself

I don’t care

Okay

I really don’t

Okay, I believe you

if you cared you wouldn’t cut

That isn’t true

It is

It is not

So you do care a little bit

No

Then go ahead and kill yourself if you don’t care

Why would I do that

Because you don’t care

I…

So you care about your life not your body

Uh… I don’t know

I think you care

I don’t want to

Well that’s different isn’t it

I don’t know

Yes you do, don’t

lie

Fine

So, do you care about your life?

Yes

Do you care about your body?

No

Then you’re right

About what?

If you don’t care about yourself or your body you’re a waste of air

What?

You are ungrateful

I am not

You are. If you were grateful you wouldn’t destroy yourself

That isn’t fair

Neither is destroying yourself

That’s different

How?

I don’t know

Exactly, I knew you wouldn’t

Then why did you ask?

Because you needed to realize you couldn’t

You are being unfair

And you are destroying your body

Stop saying that

You can’t deny it

Stop

Then stop destroying yourself

I can’t

You can

I don’t think it’s possible for me

I promise you it is

Really

Yes

Will you help me?

I can’t stay

What?

Just know that I care and I want’ you to stop

Thank you.

Don’t thank me. Goodbye.

It was a strange poem, it wasn’t even really a poem, more of a conversation. I read the poem over twice more then turned my attention to the letter that was attached.

Dear Alecia,

I truly hope you enjoy these writings, I know about your past and I know how hurt you are, but I can help you. I can take away your pain. If you want to hear what I have to say then come to Sunrise Park the day after you receive this letter and take your usual path. I’ll be waiting there.

Love,

Dec. Mason

P.S. Don’t struggle.

I read the letter through four times and even after reading it so much I couldn’t get over what he had said in the letter, “I can take away your pain.” If that was true I had to do it, no matter what it was I had been in pain for so long and all I wanted was for it to be gone. I had to go tomorrow, and even if he was crazy and had no clue what he was talking about I could at least talk to him, get some sort of closure. He could be a serial killer for all cared, I’d just have to take some extra precaution. I wasn’t going to risk my life just to meet the guy, Dec., or whatever his name was, I hated him for making me so scared, but I also loved Dec. Mason, for giving me hope, for giving me a chance to heal. I still had doubts of course, but they were nothing compared to how much I wanted to be okay again, I knew that I was crazy for even thinking that this was a good idea, but part of me somehow knew it was. It was almost midnight and if I was going to meet this guy I wasn’t going to be a tired looking slob.

I got ready for bed and tried to go to sleep, but I couldn’t stop thinking about the last line of the letter, “P.S. Don’t struggle.” Struggle against what? I was scared, but whatever he said went as long as it was going to help me heal and it wasn’t going to kill me. I was insane for thinking that this guy was going to help me, but anything was better than crying unable to change anything. This was all too complicated to handle right now, but I knew that in the moment it would work itself our. Most would be crazy for thinking something like that, but even though life sucks, it had a tendency to work itself out when you really needed it to, so I was counting on that.

* * * * *

I knew that she would come, she was so desperate to heal, for her pain to disappear. She was desperate to be okay again. I just hope she can do it, she deserved to be healed but, I didn’t know if she was going to be able to be strong enough in order to heal. It was going to hurt, I didn’t understand how humans like her were so willing to hurt themselves just to feel normal again. They went to such great lengths to make themselves feel better, it didn’t make sense, crying and talking to a therapist wasn’t going to make the pain go away, it was just going to mask it and that was never what you want to do. I didn’t want to leave her to rot in a pool of her own disgusting past and broken emotions. She was one of the few humans I had seen that deserved to heal. She would definitely be willing to make the deal.

* * * * *

I woke up at about nine and immediately started getting ready, I showered, shaved, brushed my teeth and hair, got dressed, did my make up and got my bag ready. I brought a fairly large messenger bag, in it I had a pocket knife, a mace, and a screwdriver in case I needed them. I dressed as nicely as to not look like I was threatened threatened or suspicious. I chose a pair of combat style boots and I stole one of my father’s hunting knives and slid it in my right boot. I also took care not to wear any jewelery. I wasn’t going to take any chances, I threw on a jacket, rabbed my bag and walked out the door.

I arrived at Sunrise Park by about 10:30 and started venturing down one of the hiking trails. I was usually the only one who walked this trail so I thought that it would be a good place to start. The park itself was beautiful, but the mook that had entered it today was eerie and dark. I walked until I got to a bench only to see a man sitting on the bench with a box next to him. The man looked to be in his late twenties, he had dark hair and his eyes looked tired. Somewhere deep inside told me that this was him. I continued walking until I was right in front of him. He stood up and to my great surprise he hugged me, I tried to pull away but  he wasn’t letting go. I just let him continue hugging me until he finally let go. He was quite a bit taller than me so I had to look up to see his face. I was surprised to see that it was sunken and his eyes were sad.

“ Hello Alecia, I’m Declan Mason. I am aware you are here so you can finally begin to heal .For right now you are going to have to do everything I say,” he said.

“ What am I going to have to do? I’m want to be okay again, but I don’t want to die,” I said.

“ I can promise that you’re going to die. If you even come close to dying, which is highly unlikely, you will be transported back to your home and nothing will have changed.”

“ Okay. What do I need to do?”

“ First I need you to take the clothes out of the box on the bench and change into them.”

“ What?!? No! You’re a pervert. I’m not going to change in front of you.”

“ There is a blanket in the box that you can wrap around you. I’m a sentient being and I have absolutely no interest in humans or their anatomy. I actually find the whole thing quite mundane.”

“ Okay.”

I walked over to the box and pulled out the clothes, there was also a bag in the box but I didn’t worry about it. I changed into the clothes as fast as possible making sure to keep the blanket wrapped around me so he couldn’t see any part of me. There was a pair of black skinny jeans, at least that’s what they looked like, the material was strange. A black t-shirt, a black knit sweater, a leather jacket, and a pair of black combat boots. The clothing was tight but, not uncomfortable, it actually felt strangely empowering to be in this clothing.

“Now, there was also a bag in the box, take it out and had it to me,” he said.

I handed him the bag and stepped back, he reached into the bag and pulled out a snake. My eyes widened and I took another step back as the snake wrapped itself around Dec’s arm. He motioned for me to come towards him, I moved slowly and cautiously, I didn’t mind snakes normally but this snake didn’t seem like something that was going to be pleasant to have around. When I was finally close enough, Dec reached out and grabbed my hand, the snake began to slither up across his shoulders, down his other arm, then wrapped itself around my arm in the same way it had been wrapped around Declan’s.

“ What is this thing? Why do I have to have it on my arm,”

“ This snake is here to help you,” he said.

“ Okay. How? It doesn’t seem like a snake is going to do me much good,” I asked.

“ You will soon see,” he said snapping his fingers.

I felt searing pain for a few seconds, then nothing. I looked over at my arm and saw that the snake was gone. I rolled up my sleeve slightly, only to see that there was now a tattoo where the snake had been. I looked at Declan clearly confused, but he gave me a look that made me know not to ask.

“ Okay. Now I have to sedate you for your own safety and mine,” he said.

“ Alright,” I said, “ Please, I’m scared. I don’t want to die, I just want to heal. Just tell me what I have to do.”

“ I already told you that you won’t die. I can’t make any promises about you being healed, I’m truly sorry, but that is just how this deal works. As for what you need to do, all I can say is that you have to survive, and to survive you’re going to have to learn how to deal with your past.”

“ Please there has to be something more you can tell me!”

“ I’m sorry, but that truly is all I can tell you. If I could tell you more, I would.”

“Fine. I guess just do what you need to do.”

He nodded his head, reached into his bag and pulled out a syringe. He gently tilted my head to the side gently and moved my hair out of the way. He plunged the syringe into my neck and injected the medicine. The medication almost immediately started to take affect but I tried to fight it off for as long as I possibly could. Eventually, it was too much to take and my muscles gave in, I started to collapse but Declan caught me and gently lifted me up and started to walk away from the bench. I kept my eyes open for as long as possible watching the path in front of me, but the medication finally overtook me and I slept.

* * * * *

I finally awoke drowsy and sore in the middle of a large empty room. The room was dimly lit by lanterns that were hanging on the walls. I stood up and shook my head in an attempt to clear my head, the medication was still fogging my mind. I had woken up against the wall and the exit was at the other end of the long room. The bow and arrow that Declan had given me was on the ground next to me, I bent down to pick it up and that’s when I saw him. Right next to my bow there was a pale, sickly looking boy sleeping on the ground about ten feet from where I had been. I slung the quiver over my shoulder, grabbed the bow and walked as quietly as possible over to him. I knelt down next to him and touched his shoulder lightly, he didn’t respond, I tried shaking him, still no response, I shook him more violently, finally, he groaned.

“ Hey, wake up, come on. We’re in trouble here, this is no time to sleep,” I whispered.

He groaned again and squirmed slightly.

“ Hey! Listen you need to get up or you’re going to die in here,” I said a little louder.

“ Ugh. Who are you anyway? What do you mean I’m going to die? Tell me what’s going on,” he said

“ At least you’re thinking clearly. Listen, I don’t know what’s going on exactly, but I’m here to fight my emotions so I can be okay for once in my life. I don’t know why you’re here, but if you don’t get up right now we could both be in big trouble, so get the f**k off the ground and let’s get moving,” I instructed.

“ Who the hell are you anyway,” he said sitting up, “ I’m not doing anything you tell me until you at least tell me your name.”

“ My name is Alecia. What’s yours?”

“ Orion, pronounced Or-ee-on, not O'ryan,” he said.

“ That’s an amazing name, very unique,” I said, sounding extremely rushed. I had to get along with this guy so it was better to get any information I could now and be nice about it before s**t got real.

“ Thanks, I like yours to. Alecia. It suits you.”

“ Thanks. Now, do you know why you’re here?”

“ No. All I remember is passing out in the middle of a park and now I’m here.”

“ Okay, that’s fine we can figure it out later. Now stand up so we can get going.”

He did as I said and got to his feet, he looked to be about my age, he was about six inches taller than me, had messy black hair and icy blue eyes. He was wearing a baggy t-shirt, a black hoodie, worn out black jeans, and old black tennis shoes. He was so thin and pale that he looked sickly, even though he was quite a bit taller than me somehow those clothes combined with the frailness of his features he seemed like a child. My first thought was that he actually was sick and weak, but I knew that if he had been sick he would be nowhere near as coherent as he was now. I didn’t know what to think of this boy, but right now it didn’t matter, we had to get out of here.

“ Alright,” I said, “ are you okay?”

“ Yeah,” he replied.

“ You ready to go?”

“ Hell yeah! Let’s get out of this shithole!”

“ Okay then. Let’s get a move on.”

I lead the way as we made our way as quickly and quietly as possible to the other end of the room. We hadn’t walked ten feet when the ground began to shake and I heard a scream coming from behind me. I whipped myself around to see what was going on, only to see Orion being wrapped up by wisps of black smoke. I ran over to him and tried to rip the smoke away but my hands went straight through. All the sudden I felt a searing pain in my neck, I looked over and I saw that the snake was back with it’s teeth sinking into my neck. When it released me from it’s It laid itself over my shoulders and wrapped its tail around my left arm, I wasn’t scared of this thing being on my arm, it was actually calming. Orion’s screaming was suddenly replaced by gagging, I looked towards him to see the smoke forcing its way into his mouth, preventing him from screaming.

I looked over at the snake, it was staring at Orion, I didn’t know what to do and eventually I just screamed,“ Do something god damnit! You’ve gotta be here for a reason so f*****g do something you piece of s**t. Please! Help him!”

The snake turned to me and stared for a second, tears beginning to fill my eyes, then turned back to Orion and opened its mouth. The smoke began to untangle itself from around Orion and enter the snake’s mouth. Orion started to gag uncontrollably as the smoke left his mouth, he collapsed onto his knees, too weak to stand. I didn’t blame him, he was clearly in shock, who wouldn’t be after something like that. I walked over, knelt down next to him and put a hand on his shoulder.

“ Hey, are you alright,” I asked.

“ Yeah, I think so. What the hell just happened,” he asked, his voice had become rough and scratchy.

“ I don’t know, but I have a feeling that this wasn’t a one time incident,” I replied.

“ Yeah, this place didn’t read happy fun times to begin with, but now we better learn to run like hell,” he said smiling weakly.

“ Yeah. Listen, we don’t have time for this. The sooner we get the hell out of here, the sooner we can get back to our lives and I can go back to having a life I can enjoy,” I said, moving to sit in front of him.

“ I get that, but how is being here going to do that, you don’t even know what this place is? Also why are you so desperate to have a “normal” life, why is that so important to you?”

“ I don’t have to explain myself to you. I just saved your a*s and you’re questioning my reasons for being here to save your a*s.”

“ Okay. Someone’s a bit guarded,”he said sarcastically.

“ Shut the fu-,”

“ What’s that on your neck?”

“ What are you talking about?”

“ I’m talking about the giant black thing on your neck.”

“ Again. What?”

“ Get over here you f*****g moron, let me see.”

“ No! I met you ten minutes ago and I really don’t feel comfortable having you any closer than this,”

“ Listen, I don’t give a f**k how long I’ve known you, last time I checked having a mysterious black thing on your neck all the sudden isn’t a good thing. Now get over here and let me see,” he said grabbing my arm and pulling me towards him.

I yanked my arm away and said, “Listen I know exactly what it is, so you can calm down.”

He didn’t let go, his grip tightened as he pulled me over to him.

“ Hey! I said let go of me! I said i know what it is!”

“ Quit being a b***h and get over here,” he said firmly.

He reached forward with his other arm and wrapped it around my waist, I tried to pull away but he was stronger than I thought, and he pulled me towards him with little effort.We were inches apart, I could feel his warm breath on my skin. He released my arm and put his hand on the collar of my shirt and pulled it down so he could see whatever it was better. I tilted my head away from his hand and shook my head slightly to move my hair out of the way so this process would be done as quickly as possible. At first the whole thing wasn’t super awkward accept for the fact that we were so close, that was until his hands began to move across the necklines of my sweater and t-shirt, pulling them away from my skin.

“ Hey! That’s enough. I said I know what it is,” I said pulling away.

He pulled me back towards him and said, “ This thing, whatever it is, yeah, it’s a tattoo moving across your chest and in case you haven’t noticed I’m trying to help you. Now shut up and quit being an a*****e and stop squirming.”

“ I understand that you’re trying to help me, but can you help me by not looking down my shirt and realizing that I know what it is.”

“ Take off you shirts.”

“ What!?!? No! Are you deaf? I’m not taking off my shirts. I know what it is.”

“ Listen I’m not going to see anything inappropriate and this is clearly something serious so quit acting like the immature teenage girl you are and just be an adult about this. I don’t care if you know exactly what it is, I still want to make sure it’s not going to kill you. If it makes it any easier you can pretend that I’m a doctor,” he said in a flat tone.

“ No. I’m not being an immature teenager, not that you can criticize me for that, I’m being a normal person that doesn’t want some guy she barely knows to see her in just her bra.”

“ Yeah I don’t think that “normal” is very important when you are stuck in a magical, satanic, demonized, or whatever, place where both of us may very easily be fighting for our lives and this strange tattoo thing that appeared out of nowhere on your body might be a problem if you don’t let me see the entire thing. Now what’s more important to you, me not seeing you without a sweater or your f*****g life.”

“ I don’t want to hear your bullshit criticism, I’m here trying to finally heal and you were asleep on the floor, and also, you don’t even know why you’re here. I’m sorry if my personal opinions aren’t agreeing with you here but I shouldn’t have to explain myself to someone who is clearly here by complete chance or mistake, so shut your mouth,” I screamed at him.

“ Don’t sit here and yell in my face while I’m here trying to help you, if you care about your life or healing from your past then you’ll quit being a pathetic, emotional, immature little girl and just let me help,” he replied calmly.

“ You know I wouldn’t be yelling in your face if you weren’t holding me this close to you and maybe, I wouldn’t be so aggressive and defensive if I didn’t feel like I was being captured. So could you realize that you aren’t handling this situation very well either and that maybe if you let me go I might be a bit more willing to cooperate even though I’ve told you several times that I know what it is.”

“ Actually, by holding you here I’m keeping you calmer than if you were able to run around and move freely, so maybe think before you criticize me for the way I’m handling this you should look at yourself and realize that the way you are acting is crazy and ridiculous. Now, like I said, I don’t care if you know what it is or not, I’m still want to see.”

“ Listen, I just don’t feel comfortable having you look at me like that.”

“ I guarantee that no matter what I may see I’m not focusing on anything except the tattoo that may very well be threatening your life.”

“ Still, you can understand how this would be making me uncomfortable.”

“ Yeah, I get that, but you can’t let your own insecurities, or whatever this may be about, stand in the way of potentially saving your life,” he said.

“ Fine, but you’re still an assohle,” I said.

“ I know, I try. Clearly, so do you,” he responded smirking at me.

I pulled away slightly and removed my sweater, followed by my t-shirt, I looked down to see that the thick black line had reappeared down my arm only this time ending with a snake head at my wrist. I was, however, shocked to see that at my shoulder the snake split in two and the other end wrapped around my torso ending at my hip with a tapered point. Orion first examined the one on my arm, checking every inch to see if there was any sign of infection or danger. I felt completely vulnerable having him look at me this closely, even though it was just my arm, something about it felt weird and off. Once he was sure that my arm was free of any sort of threat to my health, he moved his attention to the one on my abdomen. He had let go of my waste in order to look at the tattoo but he still kept so close to me that I could almost hear his heartbeat. As he was repositioning himself to look at my back his hand accidentally touched my abdomen which caused me to flinch and become almost completely petrified.

“ Hey, it was just my hand, I swear I’m not trying to hurt you or seduce you in any way, just calm down and remember that this is your life at stake here, not me trying to take advantage of your vulnerable mental or physical state,” he said in a reassuring tone.

“ I know but it just feels weird, you know, I just don’t like the fact that you have this much power over me. You understand that right?”

“ Yeah, I do, but I also understand that this is a dangerous situation so just be quiet and let me finish.”

“ Okay, I get that you need to finish and that this is important, but why is it so important that I remain quiet?”

“ I don’t think I deserved to be questioned just for trying to help you.”

“ Yeah, but it seems like we’re kinda stuck here together, so we might as well know each other a little bit.”

“ I agree and there is a time and place for that, but that time and place is not now.”

“ Fine just hurry up.”

This guy sure was a smug little b*****d, but the thing was that the way he looked, the way he talked, even just the way he carried himself, mirrored the kind of guy that I would go for in the real world. Something about guys like him who looked so average, small, insignificant, who had confidence, had actual educated opinions and didn’t apologize for anything just connected with me. I had gone out with popular guys, smart guys, stupid guys, nerdy looking guys, and super hot guys, but none of them had ever compared to the guys that were like Orion. Guys like him made me happy, not because their style was cool or their hair was good, which it never was, but because they knew what they wanted, they had a personality that was interesting, they weren’t cookie cutter or trying to hard, they were normal interesting people that were possible to connect with. Unfortunately, the one guy that I had gone out with that was like this, had died in a car crash a few months ago after we had been going out for a little over a year. His name had been Maliki, when we were together both of were happier and more comfortable with ourselves, we pushed each other out of our comfort zones. After he had died I thought about killing myself, I stopped hanging out with my friends, I didn’t leave the house unless I had to, I isolated myself from the world hoping that somehow that bring him back, even though I knew it never would. Maliki was the last boyfriend I’d had, and he was the only one I could say that I truly cared about and wanted to be with all the time, almost every weekend we would say we were staying at a friend’s house and then meet at Sunrise Park along one of the old hiking trails that no one used anymore except for me when I needed to think or wanted to remember him a little better. We met at the beginning of the trail then walked about two miles until we got to a place where the ground was flat and there were trees all around us. We brought blankets and wrapped ourselves up in them and looked up at the stars through the tangled branches. We never did anything other then talk, look at the stars, and maybe kiss. We cared about each other a lot but we weren’t a couple that kissed all the time or even felt the need to, we showed that we cared by holding hands, keeping each other warm in the winter, walking each other home, listening to what the other person had to say, comforting the other person when something bad happened, no matter what we did for each other it was always to show that we cared so kissing was just icing on the cake.

“ Alright I’m done, you can put your shirts on now,” he said standing up straight, still keeping close to me.

“ What? Oh, sorry, so anything of concern other than the fact that this tattoo randomly appeared on me,” I asked grabbing my t-shirt and putting it on.

“ No, not really, but I have a feeling this is going to be some Harry Potter type thing where secrets eventually reveal themselves,” he said with a slight smile. His smile was crooked, just like Maliki’s had been.

“ Well, that’s good I guess.”

“ Yeah, I guess. What were you just thinking about?”

“ Just someone I used to know that I haven’t seen in while. I was just missing him a little bit.”

“ Who was he?”

“ Just a guy, an old friend.”

“ Did you date this guy?”

“ Yeah.”

“ What was his name?”

“ Maliki.”

“ What happened? Did you two break up? Did one of you move away? What?”

“ No, nothing like that. Stuff like that is easy to get over, if we had just broken up or something I wouldn’t have been thinking about him in a time like this now would I?”

“ So what was it then?”

“ He died in a car crash a few months back. He was the first guy I’d ever truly been able to open up to and care about as much as I did.”

“ Oh my god. That’s terrible, I couldn’t imagine what that would feel like losing someone who meant that much to you. Just out of curiosity, what was so special about this guy that made you care about him so much?”

“ I don’t know. He wasn’t super attractive to most people, neither am I, but the way he carried himself and the way he looked at the world was amazing. He believed that calling someone cute, adorable, or beautiful shouldn’t just be reserved for people who look like that, he thought that those words should be used to describe personality and looks together. Granted there was one word that he reserved only for personality, believed had no other place. The word was stunning. He only ever used that word to describe someone’s personality, he always explained it by saying that stunning should only be used to compliment everyone’s flaws. It didn’t really make sense but to him, it was almost as important as saying I love you to someone. I honestly didn’t care how weird it was though, it was his lifestyle and I wasn’t going to argue with it or call it weird, mostly because I agreed with it. I just wish that he was here and that we were still together and we were both still happy.”

“ What are talking about? How are you two not together? You guys never broke up and death doesn’t mean that your relationship is over. I don’t care whether or not you think there is an afterlife you two will always be together because he’s still alive somewhere. That somewhere is in your memories and the memories of all the people who he met and talked to and impacted on this earth, but most importantly he has you. I can see how much you love him and how much you want him to be happy, alive or not, just by being that kind of person to him you are keeping him alive, as long as you never forget him and the clearly amazing times you had together he’ll never die.”

“ You sound just like him. Thank you for comforting me, I really do appreciate it. So, what about you, what’s your tragic story?”

“ I don’t think you want to hear that. I haven’t had the best life in the world but my lowest point is pretty depressing.”

“ I just told you my tragedy so you can tell me yours,” I said offering him a weak smile.

“ Fine. There was a point in my life where I was suicidal, it got to the point where I actually tried to kill myself. I obviously failed, I tried to overdose on pills but, at the last second my mom came in and called an ambulance. Once my physical body was healthy again my mother made m start going to therapy three times a week, each time ending with me angry and nearly flipping over furniture because the therapist just didn’t understand. I hated that he just kept asking me the same exact questions over and over again without realizing that he wasn’t getting through to me and whatever he was asking clearly made me upset. No one ever knew why I did what  did not even my mom, I couldn’t even bring myself to try and talk about it. I was so scared that if I actually talked about it, everything would come back and swallow me whole, to try and make things go away I did the same kind of thing you did, I isolated myself from the rest of the world hoping that things would just fix themselves.”

“ That’s terrible. At least you survived and got some sort of help. What happened that made you want to kill yourself?”

“ My best friend, Inocencia, had gone missing for about a month, that’s when my depression started to get even worse than it had been. I thought that she was dead, but they finally found her tied up in some shed starving and dehydrated, they rushed her to the hospital to try and save her. Luckily, the doctors were able to quickly get her condition stable so I could visit her the next day. I arrived at the break of dawn and we talked for hours, everything was great until she told me what had happened to her. She had been walking home with her boyfriend at the time, just as they reached her house, he grabbed her from behind and threw her into his car that had been parked out front. She tried to fight him but he was much stronger than her. He got in the car next to her and one of his friends that had been waiting for them started to drive away. He took away her purse and backpack and threw them out the window. She tried to scream but he duct taped her mouth shut and tied her up. She continued to struggle, but that’s when things got really bad, he started to hit her continuously until she was knocked out. When she had woken up she had been tied to a chair in the same shed they’d found her in, he was standing in front of her staring. She once again started to struggle, he came around and untied her but the second the knots were untied he picked her up and slammed her on the ground and raped her. Once it was was over he tied her up on the floor and began to beat her, first with his fists, then with his belt. After he’d finished with that he removed the duct tape and shove some old bread down her throat and poured water all over her head. He replaced the duct tape and left her there naked on the floor beaten and wanting to die.”

“ Oh my god. What happened after that?”

“ When I heard this I had been infuriated and I didn’t know what to do. I hated the guy that had done this to her and I wanted him dead. According to her he came back every other day and beat her in some way, sexually assaulted her, beat her again, force fed her, then left. I felt so miserable as she explained all of it to me, I thought that this would be the hardest thing I’d ever have to hear. I was wrong. When she finished explaining everything she said ‘ So, are you going to catch this guy, officer?’ I looked at her for a second hoping that she would say that she was kidding. It never came. I asked her if she knew my name, she said no, I asked if she had any idea who I was, she said no. I asked her if she remembered anything from before it happened, she said she remembered having a mom and some friends and she remembered that the guy that did it had been her boyfriend, but other than that she didn’t remember anyone else. I asked her if she remembered any names, she said she’d have to here some. I asked her mom and dad’s names, she remembered, I asked her about her brother’s name, she remembered, I asked her about her boyfriend’s name, she remembered, finally, I asked her my name, she didn’t remember. I told her that I had to go and that I would come by a few days later, she said thank you and I left as soon as I could. I started crying the second I was out the door, I ran all the way home, crying all the way, I didn’t want to believe that someone I loved so much could just forget about me. I got home and that’s when I took the pills to try and kill myself. I never went back to the hospital, I was so scared to face her again, I couldn’t handle seeing her when I knew she didn’t remember me at all.”

“ That sounds horrible, I can’t believe that happened. That’s so unfair, I can’t imagine how that would have felt,” I said, rubbing his shoulder.

“ It was, but it’s in the past,” he said, finally stepping back.

“ Still, you must still be shaken up by it,” I said.

“ Yeah, but it doesn’t affect me nearly as much anymore,” he said.

“ I’m sorry for making you tell me all that, I didn’t realize it was so terrible,” I said taking a step closer to him.

“ Really it’s okay,” he said, looking me in the eyes.

For a moment we were both frozen there, staring each other in the eyes. I saw that his blue eyes weren’t icy like I’d first thought, rather they were soft and kind, but one thing about his eyes bothered me, they were filled to the brim with sadness. It almost looked like he was drowning himself inside, I almost couldn’t stand to look at them.  He was clearly still depressed, he was dying inside, I couldn’t understand how he wasn’t dead, he’d already tried to end his own misery but he couldn’t even do that and he’d had to go through weeks of therapy because people thought that he was psychotic for trying to end his pain. He had lived a completely unfair life, the one person he’d cared about had completely forgotten his name. I was surprised that he was even standing here today, most people would still be a depressed, emotional wreck. I respected him for still being here, but I was also scared that he was going to break, he was so clearly ready to be done with the world, but he was still here and he was doing okay.

“ You’re not okay, are you? You’re still devastated, I can see it in your eyes, you are fighting a war within yourself and it looks like you’re emotions are losing,” I said.

“ So what? You are too, you’re not the only one that can see pain in someone’s eyes, you are in just as much trouble as I am with your emotions, don’t tell me that I’m still sad when you’re just as sad. No s**t we’re both still sad, we both lost the only people in our lives that made us truly happy and that we truly cared for, if you weren’t still sad I would think you were a sociopath. We aren’t robots, we have emotions, we’re expected to be sad so don’t tell me that I’m fighting a war within myself, I’m not fighting a war, I’m a being human and experiencing human emotions. Coping with emotions isn’t fighting a war, it’s not fighting at all, it’s called life and life sucks and sometimes it feels like you’re fighting with yourself, but in reality you’re just a normal human being with normal problems dealing with normal human being emotions.”

“ Fine. I was just trying to help, I’m not trying to bullshit you by making you feel small or broken, I would never make you feel broken for being sad. I couldn’t do that to someone, all it accomplishes is making people feel worse about their problems,” I said.

“ I know that, thank you, sorry for going off like that but I hate when people tell me that I’m fighting with myself,” he said.

“ I don’t like it either, I’m sorry for mentioning it, I really didn’t mean to make you upset.”

“ It’s okay, you don’t need to apologize, you had no way of knowing that I would react like that, you hardly know me, except for my biggest tragedy, but that’s not a big deal.”

“ Ha, yeah, well we’ve been talking for a long time, and though I love being sent into a clinical depression I’d rather be getting the hell out of here and continuing to move on with my life.”

“ Yeah, let’s go.”

We started to creep slowly towards the other end of the room, both of us very aware of the fact that we could be attacked at any moment. We moved quietly, this time keeping close to each other out of fear of what might be coming and for emotional support. Out of nowhere a scream ripped through the air, both of us stopped dead looking around frantically to see where it came from, no one else in the room besides us, neither of us had screamed and the room hadn’t changed at all. We remained completely still for a moment waiting for something to attack us but nothing changed. Orion started to move forward again, I tentatively followed unsure of whether or not we should be ignoring the scream. We moved a few more feet before another scream pierced the air, only this time it wasn’t a nameless unknown scream, I recognized the voice, Maliki. I tried to keep my face neutral so Orion wouldn’t worry, but another scream came, this one sounding even more pained. I broke down crying, Orion turned around and looked at me like I was crazy.

“ What is it? Why are you crying,” he asked.

“ It’s Maliki. That’s him screaming, I know it is,” I said.

“ Alecia, look at me. Maliki is dead, you just told me all about it, he is gone forever, this is just another test for you, Just remember how much Maliki meant to you and how much he loved you.”

“ But he sounds like he’s in so much pain and I can’t help him, I want him to be okay. He sounds like he’s in complete agony. I know he’s dead but I can’t ignore his screams when they sound so real.”

“ I know, I hear them to, but we have to keep going. Maliki is dead, there is no way that he’s in pain right now. He could very well be right next to you right now watching over you, he loved you and you loved him,  you have to remember that.”

“ I’m trying, I swear. I don’t want it to affect me, but how can it not I’m hopeless to try and help him whether he’s dead or not.

Another scream pierced the air, this time followed by another spell of searing pain followed by the snake appearing once more and sinking its fangs into my neck. I heard Orion let out a small yelp when he saw the snake, I felt him try and pull it off but it didn’t work, he made a noise that sounded like he had been burned. He continued to yell at me but every noise began to fade away, replaced by the sound of chirping birds and a bubbling stream, it sounded so familiar. Soon the room around me also began to disappear, it was replaced by trees and a dirt path. I immediately identified it as Sunrise Park, I began to walk down the path towards the clearing, as I got closer I heard someone calling my name. I didn’t recognize the voice at first but within a few more steps I could clearly tell that it was Maliki’s voice, I started sprinting down the path towards his beautiful voice. I arrived at the clearing in a matter of seconds to see him actually standing there, tears immediately began filling my eyes, when he saw me he started walking towards me and spread his arms. I jumped into them and wrapped him up in a hug, I buried my head in his neck and breathed in his familiar scent.

He put me down laughing, but I didn’t release him, I didn’t want to ever let him go, the idea of him disappearing again terrified me. He eventually pushed me back a bit so we were standing at a conversation distance and said, “ Hey, what’s wrong with you? Why are you being so clingy today? Wait a second, are you crying? Seriously what’s wrong?”

His voice was exactly as I had remembered it, calming and smooth, I quickly wiped away my tears and said, “ Nothing, absolutely nothing. It’s just so good to see you.”

“ Are you sure?”

“ Yes, I am absolutely sure,” I said looking at every inch of him.

He was exactly as I remembered, pale skin, warm, loving amber eyes, and soft, dark brown hair. He was wearing his favorite sweatshirt, a plain dark grey t-shirt, black jeans, and old tennis shoes. His face was perfect, he had a fairly average shaped face that usually made people look boring, but on him it looked so unique and different. He was wearing his glasses that he only ever wore around me, they had thick black frames and they made him look so cute, he always said they made him look stupid, but he always wear them when we went out because he knew I loved them so much. Everything about him was perfect, he was about six inches taller than me and was very skinny, I had met a lot of people who had the same body type and every one of them looked like they would snap like a twig, yet somehow for him it made him look stronger. Just looking at him and being able to remember who he had been was enough to send tears flooding down my cheeks, I was so happy just to be able to see him again.

He smiled at me and said, “ Seriously, are you okay? Why are you looking at me like that?”

“ Because I want to remember every bit of you and I know this won’t last forever and that breaks my heart more than anything else in the world,” I said, “ and I’m scared that you’ll be taken away from me before I can say everything I need to say.”

“ You’re crazy, no way in hell could you ever be taken away from me, not even death could make me stop caring about you,” he said, “ Whatever it is just tell me, no matter what, nothing could change how much I care about you.”

“ I just can’t bring myself to tell you, I’ve tried to find a way that won’t break my heart and I can feel the time running out and even though I know that there is no way around it I can feel my heart breaking,” I said, starting to cry so hard that I could barely finish the sentence. I really could feel the time I had with him running out.

He took a step closer and pulled me towards him until we were inches from each other and said, “ I can see how hard this is, but you have to tell me, at least then we’ll both know and we can both carry some of the burden. It isn’t fair to you that you’re this scared to tell me and I can’t even help, so just say it.”

“ I’m leaving,” I said between sobs, “ forever and I’m not going to be able to see you again for a long time. Please, don’t try and say that you’d be willing to make a long distance relationship work because it won’t and I don’t want your life to be put on hold just so you can talk to your girlfriend on the phone. Don’t try and say anything yet, you have to let me get this out before I disappear into a puddle of tears. You are the most important person in my life, you’re my best friend, my light in the darkness, my smile on a sad day, and everything in between. You aren’t my other half and you don’t complete me, you are just you and I’m just me, but me with you has been the best time of my life and having to say this is the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. The thought of having you out of my life forever is killing me and I can’t stand knowing that I can’t change anything. I wish that we could be together forever but we can’t, I don’t want this to end, I want to be able to live within our best memories for the rest of my life. I’m going to miss you so much, you are the only person in my life that made me feel like I actually meant something and I can never repay you for that. I…”

“ You what? I think I know the answer, but I need to know,” he said.

“ It’s exactly what you think, but I’m afraid it will make this all too hard to handle, the thought of even leaving this spot is killing me inside, but I really do. I always will, I can promise you that.”

Tears had already started to fill his eyes, but that sent him over the edge and they began to fall as hard as rain during a thunderstorm and he said, “ I always will too, but I have to say it or it will make everything after this more painful and make it even harder to heal.”

“ Please don’t, don’t make this any harder, I know you think it will make it easier to have some closure about it but it won’t. Saying it will just make it harder for me to leave, I don’t think I’ll be able to make it through if you say it.”

“ If I don’t say it now I’ll regret it for the rest of my life, please just let me say what I want to say.”

I was crying even harder now, but I said, “ What’s the date today?”  

“ Why does that matter,” he asked, tears running down his face carving paths down his cheeks.

“ Don’t worry about it, please, just tell me,” I said.

“ It’s March fourth.”

Those words leaving his mouth made me so upset, today was the day he died, I knew that once he left here he was going to die and I couldn’t do anything. I collapsed into his chest saying, “ I will never forget you, you will forever be my star, and like a star I know that you’ll always be there, even if I can’t see you. I love you.”

“ You are absolutely stunning in every way I can possibly imagine, I could never forget you, ever. I love you too. I wish I had said it sooner, but I’m an idiot that was too stupid to realize that something like this would never last forever. I love you so much,” he said squeezing me tight.

“ I wish it didn’t have to end like this,” I said.

He wiped away his tears and pulled at chain that was around his neck and pulled the charm out of his shirt. It was a ring, “ Here,” he said, “ take this. It was my grandmother’s that she gave me. She told me it would give good luck to whoever wore it and to only give it to someone I truly love and that’s you.”

As he put it on my finger I said, “ Thank you so much, I wish we could stay together forever.”

After standing there crying for what felt like years he let me go and moved his hands to my face and kissed me so gently that it felt like a butterfly landing on my lips. Everything about it was perfect, but the second he pulled away he turned into smoke and disappeared along with the rest of the scenery and I woke up to find myself lying down on a couch. I sat up to see that I was in a comfortable looking living room, I went to stand up and heard a slight moan come from behind me, I turned around to see Orion lying on the couch behind me. He looked so peaceful that it almost made me want to go back to sleep. I gently lowered myself from the couch to the floor and turned myself around so I could watch him sleep. He no longer reminded me of Maliki, after I’d been able to say goodbye to him no one could ever remind me of him anymore, Maliki and I were done, everything had ended exactly as it should’ve, with both of us knowing that it was the end. I looked down at my hand to see that the ring he had given me was still there on my hand, I smiled at it knowing that everything was going to be okay.

I sat and watched Orion for a few minutes until he started to wake up, when he began to squirm around I said, “ Time to wake up sleeping beauty.”

“ Ugh. Alecia, is that you? What just happened,” he said.

“ Did you get to say goodbye to her?”

He sat up and rubbed the sleep out of his eyes before saying, “ Yeah, I did. It felt amazing, I finally feel like I can move on, she even gave me a ring to remember her by.”

He lifted up his hand and showed it to me, it was an exact copy of mine. I lifted up my hand and said, “ Maliki gave me one too. I guess were two of the same.”

“ Ha. Yeah, I guess so,” he said.

“ How did it feel? To be able to finally be able to say goodbye.”

“ I saw her and immediately burst into tears, but once I was able to think of the words to say and everything disappeared I felt this sense of wonder and happiness that I haven’t felt in a long time. To finally have some sort of closure felt absolutely amazing. The world suddenly seemed less like a endless pit of darkness, for once I was able to see that the light was much closer than I thought. For the first time I was actually able to reach out and grab on to it like a rope and for once it pulled me up like it was welcoming me home instead of just letting me fall down even further, ” he gushed.

I listened intently as he continued to flood my head with his story of how she’d remembered him and how he’d gotten to hug her and finally say goodbye. He repeated himself so much that at times he sounded like a broken record, but I didn’t mind, it made me feel so good hearing how much happier he was now and how he was so close to the top of the pit that he’d been stuck in for the past year that it was almost magical. He smiled like an idiot the entire time and I sat and smiled like an idiot right along with him, not just because I knew exactly what he meant, but because I kept thinking that now, wherever I was Maliki would be able to find me and remember what I had said to him before he died. I kept thinking that he probably figured it out the second he got to wherever he had been going, There was still a big part of me that wished he was still alive, but that part of me had shrunk significantly after being able to say everything I needed to say.

All the sudden there was a loud bang and Declan appeared in the room wearing a long black cloak and holding a bag. He smiled at both of us and sat in a big comfy looking arm chair on the other side of the room. I stood up and sat on the couch next to Orion, keeping my distance, I looked down at my arm and saw and saw that the tattoo was still there.

“ That tattoo is permanent, the snake won’t bother you anymore, but the tattoo is there for good,” said Declan, “ I’m sorry for the inconvenience, but that is the price of you both being able to keep your rings. I must also apologize to you Alecia that the rules that I have to follow only permit me to mark one of you, so once again I’m very sorry for the inconvenience. Now, what’s about to happen is that I am going to transport you both back to your homes with no memory of what has happened here or of each other, the only thing you will be left with is the tattoo, as I’ve already explained, your rings, and the feeling of closure and inner peace that you have received from being able to say goodbye. I’m very sorry about any trauma that this may have caused for you, though I highly doubt there was one, but once again it was all to help you be able to heal which you both truly deserved. I do feel the need to tell you that all your memories will be restored after your death so you will be able to remember your true life for the rest of time”

I stared at Declan for a second before saying, “ Thank you so much for giving us a chance to say goodbye to the people we love, I cannot tell you how grateful I am to you. I completely understand your need to erase our memories of everything that has happened here but do you really need to make us forget each other.”

Orion heard this and chimed in saying, “ Yeah. There has to be a reason that you paired us together so why do you have to take us away from each other. I understand that we’re not that close and we haven’t even known each other for that long, but we both told one another the biggest tragedy of our lives, you really have to erase us from each other’s lives.”

“ I know that this is an unfortunate ordeal, but I am a strong believer in the idea that life tends to work itself out whenever you really need it to,” said Declan looking me directly in the eyes.

I smiled at him knowing exactly what he meant, this wasn’t over between Orion and I, not yet.

“ Alright,” I said, “ send us home Dec.”

“ So be it,” he replied.

“ Wait,” said Orion, “ Dec can you give us a minute alone, I want to say goodbye.”

“ Of course,” Dec said kindly, giving us a small smile and disappearing from the room again.

“ Alecia,” Orion said, “ Thank you for showing me that the light was still there, you deserve to heal after all this time. At least Inocencia is still alive and I can at least see her, but I admire your courage and for just being able to deal with not even being able to see him.”

“ Don’t worry about it,” I told him, “ no matter where I go I know that Maliki is right there next to me trying to keep me safe and tell me what to do. I have what I wanted and so do you, you don’t thank me for what I did, I didn’t do anything, it was you who said goodbye and didn’t break down immediately and run away. We were both strong today and because we were, we are finally going to be able to find happiness again, so don’t thank anyone but yourself.”

“ I don’t know if this is totally inappropriate, but would a hug be okay, I mean, for all we know this could be it,” he said.

I let out a little bit of a laugh and said, “ It is not the least bit inappropriate, come on over here.”

I spread my arms and pulled him into an embrace, it was brief, but when we let go we both broke into uncontrollable laughter, it felt so good to finally laugh after so long.

After we had both caught our breath Orion looked at me and said, “ You have an amazing laugh, I thought that I would never get to hear it.”

“ Yeah right. Your laugh is great too though.”

“ Thanks. I’m serious by the way, your laugh sounds genuinely happy it is awesome.”

“ Thank you very much Orion. Should we call Dec back?”

“ Yeah. That sounds like a good idea,” he said.

I took a deep breath and yelled, “ Dec! We’re ready to go!”

Even before the entire sentence had left my throat there was another bang and Dec reappeared. He didn’t say anything to either of us, he simply touched both our foreheads and closed his eyes. Within seconds everything went black and I was gone.

* * * * *

I woke up that morning with a smile on my face for the first time since Maliki had died, everything felt better for some reason. I sprung up out of bed and got ready as fast as I could, I put on my favorite outfit that had been buried at the bottom of my dresser drawer and opened my curtains for the first time in months to see that it was beautiful day outside. I decided almost immediately that I was going to go back to Sunrise Park and take a nice long walk, I loved that place and I hadn’t been there in so long that I had almost forgotten what it looked like. I went downstairs, ate some breakfast, grabbed my bag and practically ran out the door, the park was only a few minutes away so I was able to walk there without any trouble. When I got there I stood at the beginning of my favorite hiking trail that Maliki and I used to walk on every weekend. I looked down at the ring on my hand that Maliki had given me the day he died, I twisted it around on my finger for a moment before I started walking down the trail. It was just as peaceful as I had remembered it, the birds were chirping softly in the treetops and the sunlight was creating a beautiful pattern on the trail in front of me that reminded me of stained glass. I was giddy at the fact that I was even here walking the trail, but as I approached the clearing at the end of the path my giddiness began to be replaced by a feeling of tranquility. I rounded the corner and was surprised to see a boy about my age standing in the clearing, he was tall with black hair and pale skin. He was wearing baggy clothes and worn out tennis shoes, as I got closer he heard me and turned around, when he did I was surprised by how truly blue his eyes were, they weren’t cold like most blue eyes were, they were filled with warmth. The boy smiled at me and waved, I smiled and waved back as I continued walking towards him.

“ Hey,” he said.

“ Hi,” I replied, “ I thought I was the only one that still walked this trail.”

“ So did I,” he said laughing a bit.

“ I’m Alecia. What’s your name?”

“ Orion. Pronounced Or-ee-on. Not O’ryan,” he said with a smile.

“ That’s an amazing name, very unique.”

“ I like yours too. Alecia. It suits you.”

Author's Note

Please ignore any grammar mistakes and typos. I'm not that great at typing. I'm really torn about this story. I'm not sure if I like or not. Either way this story means a lot to me. I hope you enjoy and your suggestions are appreciated. : )