Three words and a glass of wine

A young girl oblivious to the world around her learns to forgive the four letters that hurt her

An empty breeze fills her heart

Mercy and depression engraved on her face

Is love intangible as the Gods we know?

Her soul replaced by an unmarked tomb

Why is love associated with the heart and never the mind?

Is the ever pumping blood vessel as important as we make it?

Deeply hurt by time

Betrayed by four letters

Her damaged lips as fractured as the land she stands on

A blade of light pierces through her Earth work, illuminating hope

Her sculptured pain slowly degrades

An immortal life re-emerged, a soul without pain

Author's Note

I would like to apologize in advance for any grammatical errors, honest thoughts are highly appriciated

Reviews

[Jerome F Knox III pseud..]

when I first read this I was thinking the four letter was "hate" instead of "love" and I guess that is derived by my own negative feelings toward love especially since today is Valentine's Day"

Love this lines........

Her soul replaced by an unmarked tomb
Her sculptured pain slowly degrades


a nicely written poem that asks the right amount of questions while searching for the answers

[Warren Daniel II]

My feeling towards the day are mutual, I thought I should try and write a poem and what better day to write a poem then on Valentines day. Thank you for reviewing my work . I tried to keep it short as possible.

[Jerome F Knox III pseudonym Nefarious J. Dorsey]

Don't worry about the length, focus on the completeness of the message....nothing else matters.

[Warren Daniel II]

So, you would rather prefer a short poem with content, rather then a very long poem with no message?

[Jerome F Knox III pseudonym Nefarious J. Dorsey]

For some reason I can't see your entire so based on the lines I can see here is my response.... The length or the amount of words don't lend to it's strength unless the message is delivered and received, than the purpose to which it is intended is best served

[Jerome F Knox III pseudonym Nefarious J. Dorsey]

When it is believed, conceived and perceived......

[Warren Daniel II]

Hmmm... Makes sense, thanks again for the review

[Valentine]

For many young people they go with first impressions not bothering to see what a person is really like. Valentine

[Cindy Marietta]

The ending was great, and your word choice was fantastic throughout, very descriptive and an a beautiful portrayal of what the girl went through

[Warren Daniel II]

Thank you so much for your review your honest thoughts are appreciated

[Olivia]

The last line ends this poem perfectly.
This poem is amazing, the concept and they way you delivered it is very interesting to read.

[Warren Daniel II]

Thanks Olivia, I'm really glad that you enjoyed this poem.

[Confuser]

I was too busy loving the poem, every single word to think about any errors. Beautiful, love it. Thank you so much. Dale

[Warren Daniel II]

Thank you so much, I'm glad you enjoyed my poem and it had such an impact on you, your honest thoughts give birth to even better poems. Warren

[Confuser]

You're welcome.

[KWP]

Nice sentiment here - ahh such is the journey through life - sometimes I think we must be grateful for the pain for how will we ever appreciate to good times otherwise?

A nice effort with layers of meaning XX

[Elisa]

This is really good dude. The diction is, as you said in the poem, "piercing." The imagery is so descriptive, without being too abundant. I feel like some people put imagery in just because that's what you're "supposed" to do, but here, the imagery has purpose in characterizing the subject of the poem. Syntactically, I would say to split lines five and six and make two lines of each. That way, each line is about the same length, which makes for more consistent rhythm and a smoother read. But, if you're not going for a rhythm, that's not necessary. That's a style choice that's comepletely up to you. So yeah, loved the poem, and I can't wait to read more of your stuff!
-Elisa

[Warren Daniel II]

Thank you so much! It was a challenge writing this, it was my very first poem. I always try my hardest when it comes to imagery I would like to assist the reader when it comes to visualizing my words. Positive comments like these inspire me to give birth to more poems. Thank you for the review

[Lynn12513]

Well writen. It's simply amazing.

[~]

Love- a feeling? a choice? or a conscientious decision to "fall"? But we always bring our baggage with us. In vain people can confess, if there is a disconnect. I really liked this piece, and your approach to it. Well done Daniel ~ (or is it warren?)

[Warren Daniel II]

Thank you so much for giving it a look, I'm glad you enjoyed it, lol it's Warren

[Lydia Shutter]

There is a thin line between love and hate. The deep emotional pain is expressed well in this one. Lydi**

[Warren Daniel II]

Thank you for your review, your honest thoughts are highly appreciated.

[Mary Bradley]

Heartfelt poem ... I can feel her devastation in love . Forgive and forget are hard things to do :-)