The Rip

 

The golden expanse of sand arched lazily into a point far in the distance that was obscured by the solid cliff face towering out from a mass of broken stone. The sand was hot under my bare feet and I dragged them under as I walked along. Looking back over my shoulder I saw my dad and little brother sitting together on our colourful beach towel. They looked smaller than my little finger held up alongside them. I let go on mum’s hand and raced her to the murky blue water. The sun was hotter away from the cliff and we had left the crowded part of the beach behind. Hoppa came lumbering up to us and panting, her pink tongue lolling out from the heat. I patted her head and mum walked up to the water’s edge, wadding forwards through the small waves. I ran up to her and we paddled in deeper.

The water was cool and I could feel the wet sand under my toes slowly dipping away. I stopped where the water reached my chest and floated. It lapped gently up against my face and I was surprised to see that it had been carried me out deeper. The waves here were higher and I could barely touch the bottom so I kicked back unsteadily towards the shallows. My legs pushed at air and my arms felt like I was trying to reach through a blanket. I was making no progress so I floated again. I could almost touch the bottom if I bounced on my toes so I walked forwards.

The water pressed around me as I struggled. My breathing turned to shallow gasps and my heart started to pound louder. A retreating wave sucked me back and I kicked helplessly; I was now further out then before. Something smashed into the back of my head and I went under. I struggled back to the surface and another wave slapped me in the face. I was ready for the next one and I ducked as it went over. I came up breathing hard and turned frantically towards the shore. Mum reached out to me and I stretched out my own hand but it was too far away. Water appeared to be filling me up on the inside until my chest hurt and I began to cry. Another wave dunked me under and spun me so that I could see the bottom inches away through the murky water. Fear was raking at my insides and I finally realised that I might drown.

I pushed my way to the surface and caught a glimpse of the next wave before it tumbled over me. I could feel the salt water in my mouth and surfaced spluttering. My limbs were numb with shock. Mum was yelling at me to stay afloat while shouting desperately for help. I jumped on the bottom to buoy myself up again. Hoppa ran along the water’s edge barking frantically. A man stood besides her looking out at us. I wondered why he wasn’t trying to rescue us.

“Help! Over here!” water rushed into my mouth and I spat it out. Mum told me to stop yelling and concentrate on staying above the water.

I saw that I had drifted further out again and redoubled my efforts to reach her. A larger wave pushed me forwards and I struggled to get closer before it pulled me back out. Our fingertips brushed and then I was too far away again. I had been so close that hopelessness engulfed me. White foam rose over my shoulders and I was thrust forwards with it. A hand grabbed me and pulled me through the sucking water until I could walk unaided in the shallows. Hoppa jumped at us, licking anxiously as we staggered onto the dry sand.

Author's Note

this is a short story i submitted in yr 10...

Reviews

[Pj]

For year 10 work this is amazing! But then again you know I love all your work lol!