Windy Night

Windy Night

Inside……

 

People

Cocooned within fuzzy blankets

Chattering teeth,

eat the warmth off candles

Waxy perfect smiles

We’re okay.

 

Outside……..

 

Wind

Roars in rebels

B***h slapping water,

waves join the rampage

Leaving a signature stamp of destruction,

of the one and only Mother Nature

Foolish, humans.

Author's Note

I couldn't resist some free verse! I was inspired by some poetry I'd read so attempted a bit of abstract stuff. I would like some feedback of what you thought of this write!
Also many thanks to OT who gave me some help with this one!

Reviews

[Lucille Borns]

Hey Chels(ea):
This is my first time reading on of your poems. So far, I am greatly impressed. For someone of your age, you are amazingly talented. I am guessing that your best subject is English?! I know mine is. But one thing that I found was that I spent too much time working on my stories, and I got way behind in my other subjects.

As of your poem, excellent. I love the way you compared the inside view and the outside view of a wind storm. I know that in a storm, it always feels good to be inside. Your sentence structure was excellent and so was your description. Most people have a hard time with description, but girl, you have it nailed! Thanks for sharing it with us!

❤ Lucille

[Tommy]

I am with OT on my favorite line being, "Cocooned within fuzzy blankets." I love the image this gives to the mind within the metaphoric expression of it. I have seen the wind do some "B***h slapping," I used to work doing masonry on high rise buildings, and Mother Nature will not shirk to show us "Foolish, humans," who is boss. I have seen her blow over a whole wall before. And those crazy three little pigs thought they were safe in the likes of a brick house. lol. I really enjoyed your delve into free verse!

Great Write!
RLG,
Tommy

[fireblossom]

That's what I'm talking about! :-)

Nice free art. Good work.

[Coyote Poetry]

I like poetry of nature. I like how you described the storm. A very interesting poem. Started with safety of a warm room then described the power of a windy night. A excellent poem. Thank you.
Coyote

[HopelesslyDevoted]

nice poem out of everyday ideas

[tynamite]

This free verse poem is really erratic which works in its favour. It's sharp, and it's all over the place with the cuts in scenery, but it works. This is really creative. I've favourited it.

[OT]

a great delve into more surreal writing - I love the "cocooned within fuzzy blankets" - this piece is interesting - the dichotomy of inside and out - protected as nature rampages around outside - in a cocoon perhaps - you paint a harsh picture of mother nature! nice write!!