Never A Love So Deadly

The red rose

Can you smell that sweet sweet fragrance?

The seductive scent that brings you in ever so close

 

Red rose

That vibrant color reeling you in

Silently beggin you to pick it as your own

 

Aww...the red rose

Teaches such a wonderful lesson

Even something of such beauty can cause pain

Reviews

[Sarah Jane]

I like it, the red rose is a perfect comparrison to love, compasion, emotion. Very well written

[Ashley June Canfield]

This is very pretty

[Jeffrey Gershom]

There is nothing that relates to beauty, love, passion... as a red rose. Your written use of the senses brings it to life. Unfortunately, something as wonderful as a rose has the potiential for the pain you write of...I know. Not many words, like a quick, seductive inhale!
Nicely crafted and greatly enjoyed.

[Jordyn A. Ruhter]

Natural talent!
Not everything that is beautiful is unprotected and you portray this perfectly with such a short yet sweet poem.

[SpokenWord]

Only if you miss handle it will one of it's thorns get you. It is actually wonderful that roses have thorns it makes people pay attention to them as they are being picked. :) Yes a wonderful write.

[underwriter]

lovely! the rose can be used as such a good metaphore and you have used it well!
'that vibrant colour reeling you in, silently begging you to pick it as your own' - beautiful!

[Texas]

Nice. It's hard to word how I like this poem. I love the "Aww" part. I can hear sarcasm in it, if that's what you were going for. Keep up the great work. :)

[AlisshalovesBrandon]

Short and simple, I love the message that you are putting out..

[Obbligato]

The short but ever so sweet tale of a rose, how it pulls you in only to leave you in pain. This poem creates a metaphor for what I would call false love. The way you feel it is real like the touch of another. The smell of the rose like their words, making you believe, more and more that this is genuine. The colour of the rose as their physical beauty, attracting you to them sexually only for you to get close (get into a relationship) and get punctured by its thorns. It’s a great analogy to use for this subject matter as love is often represented by the rose (e.g. Valentines Day). The red of the rose, which you stress multiple times in the poem, also representing passion, longing and heart in it all. The poem is written in the 2nd person. This is interesting as they are not really reflecting but more telling or teaching. It’s almost like a proverb to remind others to be careful while falling in love. Not everything is as it seems. What I would also say was that the person giving such a lesson has experienced this before, at one time in their life and is now telling others what they have learnt so they don’t make the same mistake. Maybe the writer instructing the reader in the form of poetry that they need to be wary of love. I feel that this poem would be more affective if it almost described the rose as the lover. Going further to illustrate the motion of falling in love and then the final realisation that you have been hurt. If you did this the poem would capture the reader on another level and encapsulate imaginations and draw focus to the message. Never the less a good short piece. Nice one.

[Erotic Goddess]

Beautiful imagery and very thought-provoking...only suggestion would be to have the first lines match...more symmetrical to the piece!

xxoxx