BEWARE OF DOG

A Story by E.H. Koski

This is a short story about a man looking to adopt a dog and gets much more than he was looking for.

“Come right this way,” the girl smiled at me, showing her colorful braces that clung to her slightly crooked teeth.

I followed her, feeling a bit awkward in my huge winter coat that was lightly coated in water from the melted snow. She unlocks a door near the front desk and instantly my ears are filled with the sounds of barking dogs. Inside, I look down the long hallway. I smell dog chow and a slight scent of dog poop. The cages are along the wall, each one with a chain fence wall so people can look inside. I spy a coat hanger on the wall and before venturing any further into the corridor, I slip off the jacket and put it on the hook.

“Were you looking for a puppy or a grown dog?” the girl asks.

“I’m not really sure actually,” I smiled at her. It may have just been my ego talking, but I could’ve sworn she blushed at me. “I’ve never owned a dog and wanted to get one for my girlfriend and me as a surprise for our anniversary.”

“Oh,” she looked away from me, not blushing anymore. “Well, how about we walk down the hall and if you see a dog you like I’ll open it up and you can meet him.”

I was surprised by her sudden coldness, but I followed her still. Glancing into the cages I saw dogs of all breeds, from corgis to Rottweilers. Some just puppies, bouncing around their cages with excitement. Others were asleep in their pens, snoozing away even with all this noise.

Near the end of the hall, a large white dog was sitting near its door, just waiting for someone to walk by. As soon as we did, he stood up slowly but with excitement. His tail was wagging and he seemed to smile at me. I stopped at his cage and squatted down to get eye level with him.

“What kind of dog is this?” I ask the girl, not breaking the eye contact the dog and I have.

“Here’s his chart,” she plucked the clipboard off the chain fence and handed it to me.

“Is there a place I can visit with him?” I stand up again.

“You can go inside actually,” she unlocked the door and let me slip into the cage.

Down the hall I hear a phone ring. She looked surprised and excused herself for a moment.

There was a small stool in the corner of the cage, so I sat on it as I looked through his chart. He came and sat in front of me, just staring at me with that smile.

“Seems like they’re calling you Larry. Well, Larry, I’m Steve, nice to meet you,” I scratched his head lightly as I continued to read.

Larry was a Great Pyrenees apparently who came in three weeks ago as a stray. He was in perfect health and is very sweet. They estimated him to be four or five years old. He had no tags on him and no chip in him so after two weeks with no one coming in to claim him, he was put up for adoption just the other day. I laughed, because it was the same day that I had started looking for a dog.

I put the clipboard down next to me and leaned forward to be face to face with the dog. He panted lightly, still smiling.

“How would you like to meet Kelly? She’d love a big, cuddly dog like you.”

Suddenly, the dog lunged at me. His sharp teeth sank right into my neck. I screamed, but the noise was lost in all the barking. The dog released his bite then just trotted to the other side of the cage, sat down and stared at me with a smile again.

Blood coated my hands, and my heart was racing. I fell forward onto the concrete, in the back of my mind hoping I hadn’t fallen in any poop. The bleeding seemed to have stopped, but my heart kept getting faster and faster. I looked at my bloody hands and then back to the dog. My vision changed, the colors fading from the world. Everything was in black and white like those old movies.

I tried to yell for help again, but my lips wouldn’t form into words. My throat rasped and I coughed, but it only made it sound like I myself was barking. I looked over to Larry again, and I thought that maybe a man had stepped in here to help me, but as I looked up I realized this man was naked, and he looked just like me.

“I’m sorry, Steve. But, it had to be done. Being a dog is just not an option for me,” he bent down and took the shirt that was wrapped around me.

I looked down and realized I was covered in white fur. I tried to wipe it away, but then noticed my arms had gotten shorter, and they were also furry. I tried to stand up but only was able to be on all fours.

“You look confused, let me explain. You’re a dog now, buddy, and I’m you. Or, who you used to be,” the man who looked like me chuckled as he took my pants that I was once wearing.

As confused as I was, I saw I was indeed a dog. A white Great Pyrenees, just like Larry. I thought that maybe I was dreaming, but I tried to speak again and only whimpering came out. I looked over my shoulder and saw that I had a long white tail. It wagged softly, like it was unsure of how to do it.

I heard the man opening the cage door. And I tried to jump up but suddenly having to deal with four legs took a bit of time to get used to. The man put the clipboard back in its spot, then squatted down to be eye level with me, just like I had done moments ago.

“Again, I’m sorry, bud. But,” he chuckled again, “it’s a dog-eat-dog world. It’s not so bad being a dog, you get used to it. But it’s just not for me. I was like that for the last four months, and the guy who did that to me was like that for only a few days. So, who knows? Some other poor sap will come in your cage, you’ll bite him, become him, and you get a new life, buddy. Complete with memories of your old life, and the memories of the life you just stepped into.”

He reached through the bars and scratched my chin as he chuckled. I growled and bit at his hand. I did manage to nip him and draw blood. He pulled his hand away laughing.

“It’s like chicken pox; you can only get it once. So, enjoy licking your balls until you decide to change into a human again. Maybe if you’re lucky you won’t get fixed,” he stood up, stretching. “In the meantime, I’m going to go home and hang out with this Kelly you mentioned.”

I growled again, jumping at the cage and barking viciously. He just smiled at me like he had when he was a dog.

“Say goodbye to opposable thumbs!” he wiggled his thumbs at me.

I heard a door open at the end of the hallway and barked as loud as I could. The girl with braces appeared and looked at me in shock.

“What did you do to him?” she glared at the man who was once me.

His smile was long gone, and he was clutching the hand I had bit. “I guess he didn’t like me. I think I’m just going to go home, maybe we aren’t ready for a dog.”

The girl eyed him for a moment and then locked up my cage. I barked at her, jumping at the cage door. She got startled and walked away quickly. Soon enough they were gone. I continued on barking all that night until the lights went out in the hallway. No other people had come down the hall that day. I sat down and blinked for a few moments. I’d never see Kelly again. But she’d never know that with that impostor me living with her. I growled a bit in the back of my throat. I guess there was nothing I could really do. I laid down in the cage and drifted off to sleep, dreaming about chasing tennis balls and freebies. Goodbye Kelly, hello K9.