lost..

A Story by abandoned08

She is one of the three girls in the family. She got two brothers and two sisters. Her mom died when she was 7. Father left for another girl when she was 14. She was left with other siblings with grandparents. She tried her best to finished high school. Going to school without anything, no money to pay school fees, no food in her stomach. Doesn’t matter, she wants to finish school, she knew this is the only way she can do other things in real world.

Getting that diploma wasn’t easy. No one believes her. Everyone was telling her she will never make it. She never lose hope, she did her best, gave her best to get it. Graduation day came. She wasn’t paid for the school fees. Some teachers volunteered to pay her fees. She was still left with debt in school, consequence, they didn’t want to give her toga. She argued. She fought. She fought for her rights as a student, as a human. She won. They gave her toga. She marched on the stage with the pride of being the valedictorian of the class. She got it, she finally finished high school! All the negative comments from everyone were vanished with that award, with that moment! She got her pride! Went home to acknowledge her grandmother’s effort, support, and love that her grandmother showed her. She can never be happy on that moment of her life.

But wait, that’s just the start of her struggle. Her grandmother died a month after her graduation. Relatives of her grandmother were greedy. They asked them, her sister and her to leave on that place. They said there will be no reason for them to stay there, as their grandmother died already. Nobody wants them, nobody wants her, except of her best friend. Her best friend’s family asked her to stay at their place. Her best friend’s mom is lovely. Treated her as her own. At that time, she was down, feeling down. She did lots of crazy stuff. Drink almost every night. Met lots of guys. She got this one serious boyfriend. And that boyfriend cheated on her. She was frustrated. She was staying with her aunt that time. Her cousin introduced her to a Japanese man, old man. Who wants to have a girlfriend, a paid-girlfriend. In short, no love. Only money involve. She grabbed that opportunity, because the man promised to send her in school. She took her younger sister with her and live with the Japanese man. As months goes by, the man fell in love. And started being possessive. She didn’t like that. She was young, she doesn’t want relationship, she doesn’t want old man for love. She wants that man for money, for school, for financial help, not for love. 6 months, she ended the relationship.

She went back to province. To her best friend. She tried looking for a job. She ended up working in a small canteen as a server. Getting paid of P100/day. Free accommodation, free food. Not bad for her. She grabbed the opportunity. Worked there for more than a year. She met a guy there. A guy she thought was serious about her. Until she found out, he’s married, with a son. Lucky, isn’t she? Very lucky to meet a******s in her life.

Her aunt asked her to go back to province and look after her cousin’s children. Her cousin is working abroad. Her cousin promised to help her get a job abroad. And she did.

She went Singapore, she’s 18. There’s something about to happen to her that never in her life imagined that will happen as early as that. Her cousin’s handsome has a resto/bar in Singapore. She worked for them. One month working in Singapore already. She noticed she haven’t had her period yet. She wasn’t worried, she’s 18, grew up in province, doesn’t know, or maybe didn’t imagined she will be pregnant. Her colleague asked her to get a pregnancy test. They helped her on doing it. 6pm in the evening, at the toilet of her work place, she doesn’t know what to feel. She doesn’t know what to think. But one thing she is sure of, she’s not ready to have responsibility. She’s not ready to have a child. Not at that age, not at that time. She doesn’t have anything. It can’t happen. And the moment came! Two lines on that pregnancy kit. It is positive. She’s pregnant, and the father of the child, is the guy that is married. Hahaha what a life, she thought. She was down, she felt the whole world on her shoulder. She didn’t hesitate, she made her decision. She will get rid of that as soon as possible. No second thoughts. She asked her cousin for help. She has some savings that time and willing to work harder to pay for the money her cousin will lend her for abortion.

It was hard. It was scary. It was the most unforgettable feelings. She can’t explain, she wanted to go and just continue to live with the baby, but how? How she will do that? No parents, no savings, no plan. What future can she give to that child? The same as what she had, the same as what she have? No, no, no, she wouldn’t let that happen. She will decide now and she won’t let anyone else suffer because of her mistakes. She’s not going to give a life to someone when she, herself doesn’t have a life yet.

Yes, she had an abortion……

to be continued....