Broken Hearted Girl

I have the propensity to overthink things.

I  have the tendency to think with my mind more than my heart.

So when you profess your love to me I can't help but decline.

Because the fear of your intentions being bad grows and creates this thick wall around my heart closing in on my lungs.

That's why my words sound like a wish of wind

Because I can't fathom that a person like you would love me for me.

A girl who barely remembers her name at times and neglect to brush her hair.

I'm not Prissy and hate the color pink.

I'm a horrible texter and I may reply two days later because of the innumerable times I fall asleep on my bedroom floor.

My room is always a mess and I hate math but sometimes it feels like math hate me. 

But no matter how many equations I solve it doesn't add up that you would give me the key to your heart. 

And I know the solution is to risk it all and fall into your arms, but I've been hurt one too many times and I have so many scars and so many wet pillow cases from my tears to know nothing good ever comes out of love. 

So why should I put myself in this predicament why should I give you all my time when in the end our love boat will sink only to never reaching the horizon we so destined to anchor on. 

Call me a pessimist, but my optimism died a few heartbreaks ago and I know not all guys are alike but my heart only knows the bad ones and refuse to let go. So forgive me for over thinking things and letting my brain speak for my heart, but I'm done look for the light in the dark.