Payment Due

This is one about consequences....

How right he was when he wanted to cry;

Stories live on; legends don't die.

What the mind won't admit, a good heart won't deny;

Mercy laid deeds await Heaven's reply.

 

Time once was and time will be;

What matters the most is the present we see.

Who can escape ordained moments received?

Or from what choices made mold the soul when conceived.

 

Does Mercy withhold the full payment due?

For a thoughtless moment or word told untrue?

I say to my soul don't let a wish misconstrue

the power of the choice made 'twixt two.

 

Steve

Copyright 2008

Reviews

[Lyrical Love]

Does Mercy withhold the full payment due?
For a thoughtless moment or word told untrue?
I say to my soul don't let a wish misconstrue
the power of the choice made 'twixt two.
...Excellent write!

[Aspiring Angel]

Well, guess who is back. It seems that tonight I am clicking on things I have already looked at and reviewed. As soon as I opened this great write I remembered it but wanted to read it again anyway. Guess what the second time around was even better than the first read. You are very talented and I enjoy your work. I will be back when I am not in a rush and can take my time to truly enjoy. Until then take good care of yourself. Blessings, Lesa

[Leo Gems]

It is an interesting piece you have written... makes the reader think about choices made in the past.
If you believe that eventually... there will be a price, if not here on earth then where it is Heavenly.
I love the flow and phrasing...

Thoughtful ink!!!

[Aspiring Angel]

I admire a poet that can say so much with such few lines. Wonderful in every way.

Blessings,
Lesa

[emz]

Your poetry has great flow... it's hard to find the right word to fit into rhyme but you seem to do this quite perfectly. I loved the first stanza, but the while piece was excellently penned.

Well done

[Li Li]

Second line... I think you could replace "and" with a comma.

Other than that... this is a very powerful piece. The length is short, but you definitely filled in everything that could have been left blank. So many overlook things they have now; things are no longer of value as once it was. People are so focused looking ahead of them, or dwelling on their past.... all that happens is more time passes.

I feel as though we are always born the way we will be..... yet, society can become the mold that causes a turn in creation. Self value depreciates rapidly it seems....

Wonderful write... beautiful language.

Love!

[Nicole (Carpe Diem)]

great piece of writing... love the line 'What the mind won't admit, a good heart won't deny'