If I had A Choice

If I had a choice to go where I wanted,
I wouldn’t go where it’s crowded,
where many eyes see and judge and turn-
these lessons so painful that I learned.

If I had a choice to say what I wanted,
I wouldn’t say the truth to whoever demanded,
where so many ears shut and block and deceive-
believing what they hear; hearing what they believe.

If I had a choice to stay where I wanted,
I wouldn’t stay in this world where I’m haunted,
where many words and the impalpable hurt-
and once vacant and stripped, thrown out and deserted.

If I had a choice to do what I wanted,
I wouldn’t extirpate myself �" I couldn’t, I’m interdicted,
chained by your emotions, your pity, your thoughts…
Hence I wander still, forevermore lost.

Reviews

[Kelsey Schadt]

I like the repetition of if I had a choice. I think it would be interesting to add a stanza that explores why you don't feel like you have a choice. What do you think?

[....................]

It's a tough place to find oneself, chained by the 'emotions, pity and thoughts' of another... it can become debilitating and feel impossible to move away from... the sense of hopelessness is palpable in this piece.