Ending: Chapter Four

Author's Note: WARNING: There is angst. ...But, I have discovered from this chapter that I LOVELOVELOVE to write angst.  :)  Tell me what you thought at the end!

Don't say I'm out of touch
With this rampant chaos - your reality
I know well what lies beyond my sleeping refuge
The nightmare I built my own world to escape...
- Imaginary by Evanescence

Sparrow opened his eyes drowsily the next morning, not wanting to see Sapphire lying unconscious next to him.  He knew that if that did happen, he would attempt to wake her up.  And then, she wouldn't wake up.

Sparrow knew that there was no chance that she could be alive after being in the burning woods surrounded by smoke for that long.

"Sparrow?"

Sparrow quickly opened his eyes completely and sat up after hearing Moon's voice.  That made him realize that he was in Moon's den, which had separate tunnels leading into small dens in the back for more injured or sick wolves to recuperate in.

"Where is she?"

That was Sparrow's only concern at the moment, and would be for a numerous amount of days.  Sighing, Moon shook her head.

"Sparrow, she's in the back, but -"

"Let me see her."

Moon was automatically shocked.  Sparrow had never shown any sign of worry or concern for anyone as far as she could remember.  He just wasn't the type to show any sort of strong emotion whatsoever, as Moon and many of the others already knew.  He wasn't being rude or uncaring - showing sorrow just wasn't a Sparrow thing, and it never would be.

Moon sighed again, getting frustrated.  "She doesn't look well, Sparrow.  I don't want you to be traumatized..."

"I don't care what she looks like!" Sparrow argued.  "I just... I don't care what physical or emotional state she's in right now - I just want to make sure that she's... I just want to see her.  Please..."

Moon was surprised yet again - this was the most concern she'd ever seen any of the wolves in this pack ever show.  But coming out of Sparrow?  That didn't seem right.

"...Fine," she replied, after a long and weary sigh.  "But I'll warn you... if you have a heart at all, you'll most likely be scarred for life."

After her chilling words, Sparrow stopped walking back to where he assumed Sapphire was, turning to face Moon.  "W-what?"

Moon nodded gravely. "It's true," she said.  "She... there's no way else I can say this, but she has a fifty percent chance of survival and a fifty percent chance of -"

"DON'T SAY THAT."  Shocked that he had interrupted her so harshly, Sparrow swallowed.  "I... Sorry, but... I'm trying not to think of there even being a possibility of that happening."

Nodding slowly, Moon began to lead Sparrow back to where Sapphire was lying unconscious, according to Moon.  Before they reached it, Moon stopped and turned to face him.  "Keep going back, and turn to the last den towards the right," she told him firmly yet quietly.  "I'll leave you two for now."

Sparrow followed her orders, afraid of what he was about to see, but he did so.  Right as he saw the last den to the right, he stopped and closed his eyes, sticking his head into the den, and opening them slowly.

Sapphire was lying in the middle of the den, her legs limply at the side of her.  Her eyes were closed.  She was burned, her fur charred at the ends of each strand, and the skin on her left front leg was raw from being burnt.  Her fur was wispy and looked as it it was grayer than usual, considering she was grey-and-white.  The white in her fur had darkened to a misty grey, and the grey was now much darker and smokier.

Sparrow stared at her, letting out a shaky sigh.  He didn't want her to die - she simply couldn't.  Just the very thought of Sapphire dying made him shudder, and he took in another deep breath as he dared to look at her face.

As soon as he did, Sparrow felt the unfamiliar sting of tears forming in his eyes.  Glad that Moon had left, considering that he would have to explain why he was talking to himself, he looked down at Sapphire yet again.

"I'm sorry."

Sparrow bit his lip hard, blinking.  "This is my fault..."  He now had no control over his legs as he started to shake, and his legs collapsed.  "This is my fault..." he repeated, shaking his head.  "If it wasn't for m-me, you wouldn't be..." His voice cracking on the last word, Sparrow had officially lost all will to speak.  Laying his head down, he thought of Sapphire dying.  If it wasn't for him, she wouldn't be dying in the back of Moon's den.  She'd be in her regular den with Opaque, talking about nonsense, sometimes coming into Sparrow's den with her just to annoy him.  Sparrow knew that part of Sapphire wasn't going to come back - ever. 

He looked up a while later, and noticed something.  Sapphire appeared to be breathing.  Her chest was rising and falling every now and then, but her eyes remained shut tightly.  Sparrow assumed that he must have been seeing things as he looked towards her again, but she was... breathing.

Jumping up and running to her side, Sparrow stared down at her with wide eyes.  "S-Sapphire?" he asked shakily, knowing that she wasn't able to answer but wanting to figure out if she could hear him anyway.

Her eyes fluttered open, and Sparrow's heart wrenched as she spoke.  "W-where am... I?"

"You're in Moon's den," he told her quietly.  "Y-you're alive."

Sapphire's eyes closed again, and Sparrow shook his head.  "No," he said.  "Sapphire, d-don't..."

Her eyes opened again, this time all the way.  She looked around the den for a second, still in her lying down position, and she attempted to stand up, gasping as she saw the wound on her left leg. 

"No," Sparrow told her.  "Don't... don't try to stand.  Just stay where you are..."

Sapphire nodded, taking in a deep breath as she laid down again on her right side.  "O-okay," she whispered, sighing.

Sparrow sighed quietly, wondering if she would survive this whole thing.  "You know that... I-I'm the whole reason you're in here," he told her shakily. 

Sapphire shook her head.  "N-no," she muttered.  "You're not.  It's my fault that I didn't hear you..."

"No.  It's my fault."

"Sparrow, it's not your f-fault..."

"No!  Just listen to me, Sapphire, for one second.  I ruined your whole life, and... you don't even care."  His voice broke.  "I - if I had've told you sooner, you wouldn't be stuck in here f-fighting for your life every minute."  He looked her straight in the face.  "And the worst part is -" He stopped for a moment, trying to regain his composure.  "I - I didn't even get hurt!  And... l-look what happened to you.  I was too busy worrying about my own safety, and I should've been worrying about w-what mattered more than that."  He hid his face from her. 

Sapphire bit down hard on her lip, lifting her head up from the ground and attempting to sit up.  "Sparrow, you didn't ruin my life," she said quietly.  "As a matter of fact... you saved me."

Sparrow looked up at her, a hysterical look in his eyes.  "Saved your life? S-Sapphire, if I told you soon enough, you wouldn't be..." He trailed off.

Sapphire shook her head firmly.  "No," she replied, her eyes burning into his.  "If you hadn't have found me before the flames spread, I... I would be dead."

Sparrow hid his face from her again after she finished her sentence, a sob escaping from his throat.  "But if I -"

"Will you stop talking about that?" Sapphire growled.  "That was the past.  The past is over.  We're both alive.  We can't change anything that happened."

Sparrow shook his head violently, looking up again.  "No, no, no, no, no!  Don't say that - it makes me feel even more horrible than I already do!  You just said that we can't change the p-past, and I... I know that.  I-I'm sorry for ruining your life, and there's no way that you can deny it.  No one but you in this pack ended up being this b-badly hurt, and that's because I told them s-sooner.  I didn't even notice that y-you weren't there!  And... what does that tell you?"

"...Sparrow," Sapphire said weakly.  "Look, I... I'll be alright.  I hate seeing you blame yourself for this, and I don't want you to blame yourself.  Please, just... calm down."

Sparrow thrust his head back up again, looking at her hysterically again.  "No, Sapphire!"  He was yelling now.  "I will NOT calm down!  I'm tired of not being allow t-to show my feelings around here, just because I'm 'the leader,' and leaders are supposed to be strong and f-fearless.  Well, if you haven't noticed yet... I'm not!  And I never will be.  I'll never be like Leader, or... Isis."

With that, Sparrow's words were nearly unrecognizable - his emotions had definitely taken over now.  His vision was blurry as he stared at her.  "Sapphire, I just... I d-don't want to lose y-you."

Sapphire tried to smile, but seeing Sparrow like this for long enough had gotten the best of her.  "D-don't worry," she stuttered, her voice cracking with emotion.  "I'm not going anywhere."

Before Sparrow could respond, Sapphire began to cough violently.  His eyes widening, Sparrow looked at her with an expression of confusion and horror on his face, wondering what was going on.

"Get... Moon," Sapphire choked out between coughs.  "G-get Moon!  Now!"

Sparrow tore his way out of the den, racing to the front of Moon's den where she usually stayed.  "M-Moon," he told her.  "It's Sapphire - she's... coughing."

Moon's eyes widened.  "There's smoke in her lungs," she said abruptly, and Sparrow's eyes widened.  "Fifty percent of past fire deaths were because of smoke inhalation, not burns."

Author's Note

NYAHNYAH. DONE. :D That wasn't as angsty as the original rough draft was, because I decided to tone it down a bit, considering how freaking angsty it used to be cause an overly depressed person's heart to explode. ...And I'd be sued if that happened.

Reviews

[halflives]

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! *sobs hysterically* 'Tis was VERY SAD and VERY FRIGHTENING. But you wouldn't let Sapphire die... Would you?
WOULD YOU.

[Rayne~Drop.]

OH MAI HADES MAI EYES WATERED 3. XD lol I enjoyed reading this...Seeing Sparrow start crying and being upset was entertaining. lol XD And...um....oh yeah! I AGREE WIT CHEEZIT.... idon't like chu right now... -.- Making Sapphy miserable, making me worried, having Sparrow freak out---Wait...sparrow freaknig out is a good thing. lol XD Anywayyyyyyyyyy...Damn you for leaving a cliff hanger...Sorrta...lol XD ...So...you need to write more. Cuz Sapphy NEEDS TO GET BETTER. OR ELSE I WILL BE ALL FREAKING OUT ALL WEEK. So, yeah. LUFFLEZ DIS CHAPTER. ANGST FTW. XD

[נнα&p..]

AHH MY EYES WATERED TOO. And YESSSSS you should have made this more angsty than this was. :D I love angst, it's so fun to read... but I'm like Cheezit... I suck at writing it... D: And YESSSS IT SHOULD HAVE MADE PEOPLE'S HEARTS EXPLODE. Anyway... this was amazing. I. LOVED. IT. AGAIN. I. DID. :DDD

[r]

T^T MY EYES WATERED.

I HATE YOU. I KNOW CHUR NOT GOING TO KILL HER BUT I HATE YOU. [not really,. as always, i could never hate you] but D****T!!! T^T you should have made it with even more angst!!! even if it did make people's hearts explode IT WOULD HAVE BEEN A MILLION TIMES AS AWESOME. and this is already a million times awesome! NO A MAGILLION!!!!!!!!!!

that was f*****g epic. like...i f*****g love it. like it's just...amazing. CHUR SUCH AN AWESOME WRITER!!!!! i suck at angst. D: IT'S NOT FAIR!!! BUT KEEP WRITING AND GET THE NEXT CHAPTER POSTED AND I WILL LUFF CHU!! [nh]!! THIS WAS SUCH AN AMAZING FUCKTASTICALICIOUSNESS CHAPPIE!! CANT WAIT FOR MORE!!! XDDD