so long, lover

A Poem by ashley

ripped apart from each other due to circumstances

we sat down together, never to see each other again afterwards. my first love. it was a bit awkward at first, casual and basic conversation; the air filled with meaningless fillers of sentences.

quickly, old memories of our childhood, past friendship and our antics resurfaced. it was cute, but daft in a way, i was surprised you remembered as much as you did. did you care for me more than i thought?

we were sat close to each other, but just out of reach, neither of us moved closer or further. we eased into each other after a while, bickering and joking about anything and everything. our humour and interests aligned too; although we grew apart, we still grew in the same greenhouse.

a few moments of laughter passed, and the fog of tension thickened as silence fell harshly over the room.

smiles and red faces from laughter faded noticeably under our sudden fixated gazes on each other, nobody said a word. i felt troubled at the thought of our robbed friendship, seemingly ripped away from our tiny hands we had.

for a moment we stared into each others eyes, unspoken words shared between us. it was a look of solemn admiration, looking at you is like a religious experience.

my heart running rampant, like a wild animal, held back by cage built of my bones. i could tell by the way you shifted in your seat and how hard you swallowed that you could feel what i was feeling.

neither of us wanted to pull the trigger, but you did your best. you tried to speak, but your words fell short; i break the silence.

knowing we would never see each other again, i asked if you ever loved me.

‘yes’ you said,

‘once’, it stabbed me.

‘and i never stopped’, and the knife twisted.

i felt let down that over the many years we had, i failed to tether us again, i failed to hold the ropes while you stood watching the seas.

you continued,

‘i don't think i ever will stop loving you’, leaving me bleeding.

i couldn't look you in the eyes anymore. i felt fulfilled that my life long question which burned my brain every waking second had finally been answered. but it broke me to pieces, i didnt believe you. your answer was everything i wanted to hear, but i just could not for the life of me believe you.

i confess.

we don't look at each other, but i keep trying to talk to you thinking you will some how stay, if we speak forever then how can you leave?

silence again.

we sat in the presence of each other until we wept away our sorrows and our joy and were left with nothing but the shell of each other, raw, warm, and seemingly old together. this is the last time we will see each other & i will always love you, undoubtedly.

© 2025 ashley

Author's Note

this one is a bit more contemporary, but my idea is that you are sitting in a room with the person who was 'the right person at the wrong time', and you are reminiscing, avoiding the elephant in the room. this is the final and last time you will ever get to speak to them, once you get up and leave, you will both be forgotten.