To Feel Is To Live

i'd rather feeling anything that feel nothing at all

I’m sorry I don’t drink to wash the sorrow away,

To make me dead inside.

I’m sorry I don’t swallow pills to ease the pain away,

To make me dead inside.

I’m sorry I don’t cut to bleed the guilt out,

To make me cold,

Because I would rather feel this pain, sorrow, and guilt

Than be a static mold.

Because at least than I know I’ve live,

And though my heart has been cold

It has also been warmed,

But your heart’s frozen over,

And you’re dead inside.

 

I’m sorry I’m a broken and drained teenager

Who believes that happiness and pain coincide,

But I’d rather be broken and tainted than a lifeless wager,

Incapable of emotion, incapable of changing, incapable of breaking,

Because then I know I have the ability to pick up the pieces

And one day heal.

But your soul’s in broken, frozen parts forever

Never to warm, never to mend.

 

I’d rather scream than stay quiet,

I’d rather cry than portray a fake smile with my fake visage

Because I need to feel this for myself,

Because feelings anything at all is knowing I’m truly alive.

And I know from the wounds on my heart

That I’ve lived this precious life, unlike you.

Because I’d rather feel anything than feel nothing at all. 

Reviews

[Chantel]

Oh my word--I absolutely love this. I can't even express how awesome I think this is, haha...very, very, VERY good job and I'm adding this to my library for sure! :)

[A.Lee]

"But I’d rather be broken and tainted than a lifeless wager
Incapable of emotion, incapable of changing, incapable of breaking,
Because then I know I have the ability to pick up the pieces
And one day heal."

Beautiful (and extremely true) lines. Your poetry always overflows with feeling. Great work, as always.

[Marie Harrison]

Excellent rant! That's right you are alive when you feel the pain. I admire your courage to feel it, what a great choice. Healing will come sooner that way for you. I loved your poem.

[Coyote Poetry]

Your words are very wise. Easy to fall to drugs ans alcohol. Hard to see life with real vision. Life is filled with good and bad. To feel is to be alive. Nothing that is worthwhile is easy. Last line is outstanding. A excellent poem. Thank you.
Coyote