Leaving Behind

Narrative Poetry

I left you in your room, a little cot

desk lamp beside, some stuff on the floor

a roommate with a smile, you smiled back.

I sniffed the air, did it stink of smoke?

The whitewash peeled in corners, as you lay

on single sheets, on your bed, with a book.

I hang around, rattling here and there

I check your bed, your suitcase and your chair.

Voices float, there's a party next door -

you want to go, if I were gone, I know.

You look at me, pleading eyes: 'dad please'

it's time to leave, with uncertain ease.

I take a step, glance back, you look at me

'what now?' I hear the silent voice

I check your phone, the battery, the charger hooked

'call me', I say the fourteenth time.

I know you will, and so I kiss goodbye

my treasure left, in a little room, I sigh.

The wind is cold outside, I drive with windows down

But I am colder, I left my heart behind.

Little hands and feet, from videos distant past

your arms around my neck, laughs and cries melting fast.

You will not see today, the trembling of my hand

An empty world, an empty man, driving on and beyond.

Author's Note

Experimenting with narrative poetry: imagine a parent leaving behind a college going kid in the dorm for the first time, and returning home to an empty nest.

Let me know what you think.

Reviews

[OT]

successful experiment I'd say!! reads so well, great implementation of dialogue which fits in well with the poem! some great lines here alluding to the pain of separation and want to safe-keep a child - my favourite:

"I know you will, and so I kiss goodbye
my treasure left"