3's a Crowd?

a short story about a girl and her two lovers and what kind of person she has become because of her relationships with these two desirable men.

Theme:  3’s a crowd ?

He’s sweet, innocent, weird, and cute, loves me to death and would do anything for me. He’s everything that I could want in a guy but yet there’s that certain quality that he lacks like. There’s something he is missing that would turn him into the complete package. Wait I think I know what it is, intimacy. Our personal relationship use to be on a high at one time but now I feel like I don’t want to touch him or I don’t want him to touch me. I love to cuddle and lay down with him because he’s so comfortable to lie with but anything further than that is a big no! Why am I feeling this way? Why wouldn’t I want my boyfriend to touch and love on me the way he used too? What’s wrong with me? Do I not want him as a boyfriend anymore? Or is it somebody else? All these questions run through my head and I can’t seem to find the right answers for them.  Wait, wait, and wait for real this time I think I know what it is again. I think it’s because I haven’t been the most honest person to him. Every day I live with this guilt of not confessing my lies to him especially when I had the chance to do so. I backed out of saying the truth but only to spare his feelings and our relationship. I know it may sound selfish because if I really cared about our relationship then I would have never put our relationship in jeopardy of falling apart. Which bring me to my first semester of college.  It was my first year of college and I planned to dorm on campus so I wasn’t going to see John as much as I use to. Mind you we were together 24/7 because we went to the same high school. We would meet in the mornings, in between classes, after school, then we would walk home together and he would hang out at my house until it was time for him to go home. That was our daily routine. That was our life. It was filled with pure innocence, congruence, love, and laughter.  Our relationship use to be fun and exciting now and days we both get annoyed so easily and are so quick to walk away from the relationship. It’s like we don’t really care enough to keep it going. Its honestly emotionally and physically draining. I mean look at me now compared to how I use to look. I use to be that girl that every guy wanted to be with and the girl that u wanted to look like. I had this fabulous physique with presence of confidence and grace that I carried with me. I was mesmerizing and no matter how shy I was, you will remember me. Those were the days when life was great and our relationship was taking a turn for the better. But little ol stupid curious me wanted to experience the “college life” and sold myself completely short in the long run. After being in a relationship for 2 years you start to wonder well what else is out there and you always imagined what your life would be like if that special person wasn’t in your life. That’s how I was beginning to feel, like I wanted to just take some time from our relationship just to experience new people in hopes that we would eventually get back together because at the time I wasn’t ready to be in a committed relationship. So I did my dirt and I kissed a few guys, had some intercourse with some and was living care free but not realizing that someone had to get hurt somewhere along the line. John was a great boyfriend he would constantly call to check up on me. He would genuinely love to just talk to me and I could feel how happy he would be and just to see how much I had a good a*s boyfriend that I didn’t deserve. All he ever did was do right by me but I couldn’t even do that for him. Well in the beginning of our relationship I was. I was the perfect girlfriend to him and I made sure of that. But me wanting to seek out other ventures, yea all of that changed. I remember that one time I came back to school from my winter break and we left on such great terms. We celebrated our anniversary together, brought gifts for each other just a good overall break. Then I came back to school and blocked him from calling me for three weeks straight. At the time I felt like I wasn’t doing anything that was a big deal. I mean I knew he was going to be upset that I did that to him but I figured he’ll just get over it. So I continued my rebel behavior and would block him and unblock him whenever I wanted. I wouldn’t pick up his phone calls and would constantly ask for 2 week breaks just so that I wouldn’t have to worry about him calling me and me having to not answer it. I was just doing me and like I said at the time I thought that kind of behavior was acceptable because I always got away with my antics. So the first boy that I ventured out to was introduced to me by my best friend. She was talking to this guy who had a best friend that was single and she wanted to tag along to double date with her. You know like being a wing man but in this case a wing woman yea that I was. So I knew that that was something that I shouldn’t have done because I was in a relationship with John. But against my better judgment, I still entertained him. At first I thought he was very ugly and wanted nothing to do with him so I cat fished him. I sent him pictures of someone else just messing with him I wasn’t going to keep that lie up for long it’s was just for fun but he eventually found out it wasn’t me so then I sent him a pic of me and then it went from texting to facetiming. And the more we facetimed the more I was beginning to like his personality. So I got passed his looks and just started enjoying him for him. His name was Rich a really great guy who knew me for me. At a certain point I felt that maybe he knew me better than the person that I have been with for almost three years. He knew what I liked he knew what I was thinking and how I was feeling. He would come home with stuff for me that I didn’t even have to ask him to bring he was just that thoughtful. He would do literally anything for me but at the time I just wanted sex. The way we would do it, it was passionate and fulfilling that I was willing to risk losing Chris to be with him. So I did just that. I eventually left Johnathan and had no regrets about it but always put it in the back of my mind that we would end up together in the future. So I went on to be with Rich and it was great I then love out simple life that we had. He went to work I went to school we would meet up on Thursday and spend the entire weekend together. We had a system that worked and we both loved how the relationship was moving so far. He was a very generous man that just new how to take care of me. And I loved every moment of being with him but I knew that I couldn’t see myself with him future wise so I knew that our nice little fairy tale was going to come to an end. Or did it ever end?

Author's Note

what do u think happend to rich?
do u think hes still around?
what do u think happened to john?

Reviews

[emmajoy]

Forgive me but i read so far and had to stop.

Your story needs a great amount of careful editing. Is written in First Person throughout - by you, about you, from you.

Ask me again to Friend and review you when the story is presented as per my message to you. Will be glad to help.