Some Nights

a spoken word piece I have been working on

You said I love this song.

Shoes come off.

Gauges get thrown on the coffee table.

Your foot reaches for the rest.

A beer just begging to be drank in your hand.

Your voice creeks.

Listen to it.

Give me your hand.

Come here.

Sing with me.

Why does your voice sound like that?

Why does it sound like everything I’ve been looking for?

Song ends.

How can you look at me with those eyes and not kiss me?

How can you turn away?

Why do you push me away?

“Leave.” The word trembles on my lips.

The door slams.

The Car starts.

The Music roars.

The Tears poor.

How could I ever explain that as much as I said go away I meant stay forever

How could I expect any emotion if all I could give you was a wall

6 months later sitting in an empty dorm an hour away

That song comes on and I break.

I reach for my phone

But instead of dialing you I open facebook and scroll

I see you.

Happy and in love with someone who didn’t make you fight

Someone who says “my boyfriend” not “you’re a great friend”

Someone who says love me, kiss me, hold me.

That’s all you wanted.

That’s all I wouldn’t give.

Because that’s called feelings and they scared me

But now as I sit in this empty dorm what is this

This is feelings and they scare me

But what scares me the most is I didn’t take the risk

Afraid to take the leap because you could have hurt me

But what is this.

But self-created 

Loneliness.

Author's Note

My first poem besides projects for school. Critiques appreciated!