Sandman

I'm really tired...

I wish I could sleep, but those things keep my mind racing and turning.
The thoughts rolling in violent waves in this abyss of memories.
I just want to hit pause destroy the projector and fall into a quiet slumber.

But, here I lay staring at this white wall wishing Mr. Sandman would find me.

As the images flair past my colorless eyes.

Oh, how I wish I could find the proper words to express the things welling deep inside.

But, such words sadly bear no exsistance in this barren place.

I have hope and I feel love.

However these deep regrets with dealing which I have long prolonged.

Now make their arise.

Determined to smite me back down into the black hole I fought to free myself from.

To return me to the binds of my past regrets.

They use the sadness from lost.

And the guilt riding on my concious.

The need to blame myself for things gone wrong in the world.

The care I have for people.

To try and make me forget about this golden heart that strives to keep beating.

I'm exhausted and with no place to turn.

So, I finally let myself cry.

Broken, lost, and derranged sobs.

That express so many things that were still harbored deep within inside.

I finally faced the monster I feared for so long.
Dealing with the terrifying things that had haunted my past.

And now I watch these memories.

Fluttery by on their way to someplace else.

The pain they once held going with them.

I stay awake because of this strange freeness.

I don't know what to do.

To feel the burden of nothing is a strange feat.

I will learn as time passes on.

For now I lay here staring at this white wall.

Waiting for the Sandman to pass his warm hand over my heavy eyelids.

And let this warm sleep pull me into her gentle embrace.