Tapeworm

Tapeworm

A Poem by dustyhowls
"

For a contest on here. I'm not as good with poetry as with prose, but hey, I tried.

"

You're the shattered glass beneath my well-polished skin.

You're the near-perfect excuse, every time I sin

You're that infamous poison apple, intoxicating me, 

So come and find me.

Come out and find me.


You're the unbearable weight holding me down,

I'm sinking under your foul surface without a sound;

But now we're wasting our time flailing in a shallow pool,

Soon we'll be sinking in a deep dark sea, salty as my tears, 

So come and drown me. 

Come out and drown me.


You're the diesel in my aluminum foil veins, causing 

My already sore (but not yet soured) heart to turn jet black and putrid.  

Thanks to you, everything I do will always go drastically wrong, 

I'm fated to stumble on this uneven ground while singing your twisted song, 

So come and trip me.

Come out and trip me.


When I'm hurting myself, my star-struck eyes can see 

Painted clowns' faces, rivers of ash, you laughing at me. 

So I keep on cutting myself into even smaller pieces, 

But you hide yourself well, and I'm the one who bleeds, 

So come and lick me. 

Come out and lick me. 


Deeper down inside than you, or even than me, you'll see 

With your evil burning eyes that I want revenge, just like you; 

But I don't desire it on my poor repentant begetter, 

I long to take it on none other than my ultimate tormentor, you; 

So come and face me. 

Come out and face me. 


You're the splintered wood in the shaking palm of my calloused hand, 

You're the uncaring tapeworm slowly eating away at my insides 

Until there's nothing left of me.  Sometimes I'm afraid of turning into you; 

I'm scared of your remorseless chewed up fragments conquering my fragile paper, 

So come and devour me. 

Come out and devour me. 


Torn pages of my soul fly across the darkened room -- the lights are on 

But your shadow obscures them, until I am hopelessly blind -- 

Yelling I hate you, I hate you, with all that's left of my heart, swallowing 

Charred shards of fragmented and dusty mirror glass, ripping 

Apart my well-used vocal cords, I can never sing again!, choking on my own 

Blood, and yet, despite my best (though diluted) efforts, I still haven't killed you, 

So come and murder me.

Come out and murder me. 

© 2010 dustyhowls


Author's Note

dustyhowls
Anything, be as harsh as you want.

My Review

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Featured Review

Shaken.
On one surface the poem is like a tantrum, yet on a deeper level there is adult anguish. It strikes me as a soul who will not go out without a defiant if losing fight. The call and challenge to the antagonist is mesmerizing and even more stunning as the challenge seems to come out of sure defeat. Thank you for sharing. Very well done.

Posted 10 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

'You're the shattered glass beneath my well-polished skin.
You're the near-perfect excuse, every time I sin'

The mental image seems to cut into my brain a little bit :) as do 'Charred shards of fragmented and dusty mirror glass, ripping apart my well-used vocal cords,' and 'You're the splintered wood in the shaking palm of my calloused hand '.

Very good imagery to describe self-harm.

'But you hide yourself well, and I'm the one who bleeds '

I think this kind of sums up the poem and the feeling you're capturing---the need to cut to drive away the evil within, but it only makes it hide, it never lets it out with the blood like we hope it would.

Good job :) keep writing

Posted 6 Years Ago


beautiful!
You really portrayed the mental feeling when self harming. You really got the mood, and even managed to explain the anger, hate, pain, calmness and energy of the pain.
You're a very talented writer,
Good luck xxx

Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Shaken.
On one surface the poem is like a tantrum, yet on a deeper level there is adult anguish. It strikes me as a soul who will not go out without a defiant if losing fight. The call and challenge to the antagonist is mesmerizing and even more stunning as the challenge seems to come out of sure defeat. Thank you for sharing. Very well done.

Posted 10 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

The build of tension is amazing; the poem as a whole is gripping throughout.Very nice use of metaphors, they create such vivid imagery. I love the darkness yet childish nursery rhyme-esque quality of the rhythm and repetitive use of the "so come and..." phrase. Great use of language, brilliant piece ^-^

Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

"You're the diesel in my aluminum foil veins" I love this! The entire tone, the antagonism, it's dark and moving. Very well done.


Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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646 Views
5 Reviews
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Added on March 10, 2010
Last Updated on March 10, 2010
Tags: shattered glass, self-hatred, self-injury, self-harm, cut, hurt, pain, hatred, intoxicating me, drown me, face me, beneath my skin, I hate you, I hate myself, murder me, dustyhowls

Author

dustyhowls
dustyhowls

Stockholm, Sweden



About
Hi, I'm a fifteen-year-old emo/goth lesbian American who is currently living in Stockholm (I was born in Paris, lived there until I was almost twelve, when I moved to Philadelphia, Pennsylvania for tw.. more..

Writing



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