Locked Up

  Susan received the foreclosure letter on the house she owned in Texas one month before while she worked as a teacher in New Mexico. She waited until school was out to make the trip to check on her property. The renters promised to pay towards the mortgage instead of sending her the rent. That way, she taught school and only had to worry about her living expenses where she resided. She didn’t know the renters had moved.

 

  The drive took her twelve hours, but it would be worth it if she could pull some of her belongings out of the house before the bank took control. Tired as she was, she pulled the old Chevy up to the front of the house she owned for fourteen years. It was dark and vacant. The grass grew as tall as her knees and since she didn’t remember to bring a flashlight, she had to be careful where she walked. There was a possibility that ant beds or snakes lurked in the overgrown yard. She remembered that fire ants were a big problem before she left.

 

  First, she tried the old house key on her key ring. When that didn’t work, she took a credit card out of her purse to jimmy the lock. Apparently, the renters had changed the faulty doorknob and put in a deadbolt that wouldn’t budge. Next, she took her tire tool and tried to pry open a window. The first one didn’t move, so she walked around the house and tried all the other windows but none of them would open. Under the pole light in the backyard, she noticed new window locks through the glass. The house was locked up.

 

  Tears filled her eyes as she sat on the porch, thinking about the expensive appliances she was losing, the furniture she left in this house for the renters to use and all the keepsakes she stored in the garage.

 

 A police car pulled up in front of the house. When she saw the cop step out of his car and walk towards her, she heard the front door open.  The porchlight came on and a man and woman stood in the doorway watching the officer recite Susan her Miranda Rights.  The bank had already sold the house.

 

Author's Note

half is true

Reviews

[Wayne Peake]

Hi Janyce

Nicely written story, the tone and mood were just right and it is a complete story with confict nd conflict resolution... I could really relate to the main charater's dilema.

[Rain]

Well,
What ever half is true, it's still a hell'va story. I can definately see the school screwing up and not sending the payment, but it's from there the story might be questionable. But, I LOVE true life life stories. Great write. Rain..

[Blackbirdsong]

wow I could see myself in this woman's place and feel her hopelessness for not being able to open the lock. You really painted a vivid picture there...of course you always do...you just have that particular ability and you use it well in this piece. Great write :)

[Leah Maldonado]

awww this is heart breaking. Its a good story but add more description so that the reader can be taken right to where she is.
really beautiful
Leah