letting go

Letting it all build up,

always trying to let it escape

but never does til it's too late

slowly the tear ducts

leaking as fast as a waterfall

yet still dripping like helium

evaporating from a balloon

soon drying up like wilting flowers

after a summer bloom.

 

If this is what love feels like

then I want no part

to have another broken heart

It's a wonder why I push people away.

 

Love Sucks!

 

Reviews

[Jibey]

Lilith has made some useful suggestions and I agree with them... but the tear ducts leaking was a striking phrase and the wilting flowers. It all just needs tightening up a bit...

[Lilith]

This poem is okay. Just okay.
Firstly, titles should be capitalized!
Also, the very last line is, well, it's just not poetic at all. Remove that line completely.
Also, on the last line of the second stanza, I believe you meant, "It's no wonder" not "It's a wonder". If you didn't, then that just doesn't make any sense!
And in the first stanza, "yet still dripping like helium evaporating from a balloon"
I understand what you are trying to convey, but that actually wouldn't make any sense. If helium is released from a balloon, it would rush out quite quickly, not "drip"! I'm sure you could find a better comparison to use there.

All in all - if a few corrections are made! - this is a decent poem.