last lucid travel

last lucid travel

 

 

traveling to Spokane

the intensity of rain

in my mind,

a deluge of sadness

lightning strikes my brain's strain

thoughts of you won't drain

 

reason sputtering

i've run out of gas

and acclimation to the fossilized life

that causes me to drive so much slower

and pack an extra umbrella

 

to ward off recurring storms

of you

of age

of rain washing away

my vain brain.

 

 

erin-cilberto

8/12/19

Reviews

[Kesch (Finding Julia)]

I love your last stanza, This is so well written and said.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind words, kescha,
j.

[Kesch (Finding Julia)]

not a problem sir....

[Dave]

It seems the only good thing about getting older, fossilized, is the memories we have managed to save. The loves we have had are long gone, but the remembering of them all lingers. Try as we may no amount of rain will wash them entirely away. Thankfully, being human, we tend to best recall only the really good memories. I think you poem was nicely stated.

Take care - Dave

[jacob erin-cilberto]

i appreciate your insights, Dave,
j.

[Bonnie Paige]

A poem that makes you think. Rain in my brain is a newness of thought. I like it in place of tears in my heart or showering of tears.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind review, Bonnie.
j.

[Lorry]

Do we all end up as a mere resonance in others, or is it a one way street we get caught on, in an infinite journey of rain and what ifs? I only ask so as I know when to expect an ending from those mind ghosts and freedom to take a detour elsewhere.
Maybe we should all leave our thoughts in our own spoken when we get there, fill up, check the oil and tyres and floor the gas pedal until we get to a less sodden destination.
Umbrellas everywhere here, but we all still get caught out too.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

i appreciate your questions....valid...and i wish i knew the answers...thank you, Lorry,
j.

[Jimmy Yetts]

Appears to bemoan "a fossilized life" in one petrified forest.
Constant loss, an emerging legacy.
Bleak prospects.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your insightful words, Jimmy,
j.

[Chris Shaw]

I sense inner turmoil here. 'the intensity of rain in my brain'. It seems much of it is bound up in the past and of someone who is no longer on the scene, but you would like to have around. Packing an extra umbrella? Maybe making sure you don't get caught out again.

Good poem Jacob.

Chris

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your insightful review, Chris.
j.

[The Twin Arenas]

There's nothing quite like Idaho in the rain to start piecing together time and where you, and everything that isn't anymore, roll. Real sparse. I like it.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your kind words,
j.

[John the Baptist]

The themes of aging and loss converge in this poem which may be based on an actual journey. The northwest is known for its rainy weather, but the downpour is also symbolic of the inner storm the speaker is experiencing. There is a longing for someone who is no longer in the picture which runs parallel to a sense of passing time. The second verse is full of images of decline, of "washing away." A somber offering, this one, almost a warning of impending depression.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you for your keen insights, John...
j.

[Julie McCarthy (juliesp..]

Jacob this is brilliant love it, thankyou for sharing!

[jacob erin-cilberto]

thank you, Julie...
j.