a crowd of one

a crowd of one 

 

crooked springs

the bed wore thin

 

embrace

couldn't hold it up to specs

 

a comfort no more

too much space

 

the sheet written upon

with lonely pen

 

a body writhes in singular pain

the couch calls like a studio apartment

 

maybe there, I can paint

the model who only exists 

 

in my past.

 

 

erin-cilberto

5/13/24

Reviews

[Thomas W Case]

Tremendous work. Powerful imagery.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you, Thomas,
j.

[John Sullivan]

Yeeup. Memories are what they are... You're one of the greats, Mr. E.C.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you for the kind comment, John,
j.

[andrew mitchell]

I thought this to be a haunting write J, the writer seeing images of his past in areas of his house, they paint a picture only he can see. Excellent as usual.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you, andrew,
j.

[emmajoygreen]

Perhaps feeling that your alone-ness is your only companion is, in itself, a memory.

A crowd of one, tragic - it strangely magnifies self into more than one The space around becomes more than ever can, could. Is like wearing an over large, unbuttoned coat and feeling icy weather between body and cloth, fingers too cold to do up the buttons. Perhaps.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Big coats are too hot...but they are there.
Thank you for your words, em.
j.

[emmajoygreen]

I try, Jacob. It's all I can do.

[Fabian G. Franklin]

Alone in the crowd or alone in the alone, it seems there's little difference to me. I hear a George Strait song, "That one bedroom apartment where I get my mail,
is really not a home, it's more like a jail,
with a swimming pool, and a parking lot view.
Man, it's just great." from, "I Hate Everything"

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Interesting lyrics...thank you, Fabian,
j.

[Amy R]

The title alone holds such depth
"A crowd of one."
I felt the emptiness in this piece, sometimes we end up in places we don't belong... we must then find out where we truly belong by observing the places we visit....

Great write dear poet
-Amy

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you for your kind review, Amy,
j.

[Amy R]

You're welcome...

[Soren]

A great title for a lonely poem. So many great lines starting with the first "crooked springs the bed wore thin" Springs are what support the weight of what lies upon it and the next line showing that the support of this relationship had worn thin. No physical "embrace" or emotional could continue to support it with the next two lines being quite clear; The next two lines are my favorite, as they seem to be to others as well. The end of the poem gives continued thoughts of what was and no longer exists. So nicely penned Jacob

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Such an insightful review, Soren.
much appreciated.
j.

[poetgurl]

the sheet written upon
with lonely pen

I love this part, I like the loneliness this write represents.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

I appreciate your comment, Meg,
j.

[Papaya]

This speaks of loneliness to me. The "crowd of one" is such a great line that speaks to how deeply the emptiness around us is felt, so much so we question if we are in the right place, or if we belong.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you, Ana,
j.

[Papaya]

You're welcome, Jacob. 🙂

[Weeping willow]

Simple scene painted with your words, speaking volumes across the page. Nicely spoken ;-]

[jacob erin-cilberto]

Thank you kindly, willow,
j.