I don't Have a Father

I don't have a father.

He is not dead.

He is very well alive. I have his number, his address, and I can talk to him at any moment.
He did not completely abandon my family and disappear.
I met him. I visit him
Often.

But when I think of the word "father," I don't think of him.

I have a step-dad.

A man who respects and supports me in every way, more than my biological father could ever dream of. He is proud of who I am, and proud to call me his daughter.

But when I think of the word "father," I don't think of him.

I have a boss.

When I was 18, he took me under his wing to help finance and support my education, giving me my first official job. He fueled my confidence and showed me that I can stand on my own two feet.

But when I think of the word "father," I don't think of him.

I have an uncle.

When my father showed me he doesn't care, leaving my education unfinanced and leading to multiple almost-expulsions from schools, he would come to my rescue and assure that I could have a future.

But when I think of the word "father," I don't think of him.

I have a mother.

She raised me to be a strong, independent, and educated woman, and taught me that I can do anything I set my mind to.

When my father made a promise, she would keep it in his stead, so that my respect would not go unfounded.

Even though my fathers did many wrongs, she would keep them from me in order to protect my faith in the world.

When I think of the word "father," I think of her.

Author's Note

April 7, 2016

I wasn't sure if I should upload this, because it is very personal. But here it is.

Reviews

[Gee]

Neither do I, so being a father to a beautiful 16 year old daughter I now try to be fir her everything I would have wanted a dad to be in my life. We have a wonderful relationship and to top it all she plays football( soccer)

[Writer at last! Sky ~]

Erlance I had seen your website, your art, and now finally your words. You an extreme genius I've ever met. Its really sad to read your "I don't Have a Father" but I'm sure you're blessed with many good people around you like your Mother, Uncle, Step-Dad, Boss and maybe some of your good friends.

Extremely happy to be one of your friend. Sending lots of blessings for my new friend :)

[Phoenix Aradia]

Wow! I can relate so very strongly to this poem, I have a very similar situation.
I especially admire how you keep from sounding bitter. Instead it is overcome by a tangible respect and appreciation for your mother. The use of the refrain is powerful and sobering. I also like the 5th sentence juxtaposing abandonment and disappearance with "not completely". It softly drives home the importance of what was lacking from him.
As far as critique; I could really only cite a couple of grammatical inconsistencies that are very minor, such as the switching of tenses (i.e. "doesn't care" could be "didn't care").
Very good job! I look forward to more from you!
- Phoenix

[erlance]

Thank you so very much for taking the time to read this and offer feedback! And for your kind words. They really mean a lot