the 5 sense's

the 5 sense's

A Poem by fashionchics

I hear, not listen
I shout,not speak
I watch,not look
I touch,not feel
I sniff,not smell

by jessica freeman

© 2008 fashionchics


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Aww. This is so .. deep and yet it's so short. I like all the line except for "I watch,not look" watching and looking are kind of the same thing. Since you were going for a contrast, perhaps it should read .. "I look, not see."
Other than that I liked the contradictions of the senses. I think for a beginning writer, you're doing well expressing yourself :)

Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

Aww. This is so .. deep and yet it's so short. I like all the line except for "I watch,not look" watching and looking are kind of the same thing. Since you were going for a contrast, perhaps it should read .. "I look, not see."
Other than that I liked the contradictions of the senses. I think for a beginning writer, you're doing well expressing yourself :)

Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

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Bre
that was so short and simple


i loved it lol

Posted 16 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


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2 Reviews
Added on July 18, 2008

Author

fashionchics
fashionchics

adelaide, Australia



About
Hello there, My Names Jessica, I started writing at the age of elven, i'm now fifteen, and writing is my passion along with art and photography. I only started writing becuase of drama's that happ.. more..

Writing
Pain. Pain.

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