I am a man

A poem to perhaps make you think?

I cut myself last night

I'm not telling you this for sympathy and I'm not looking for attention.

No, I tell you this because I know it's been forgotten. 

It's been forgotten that sometimes, a boy lies awake late on a school night making indents in his skin with razor blades and bleeds every shade of red.

It's being forgotten that there are boys who wear long sleeves in the summer and have blood stains on their pillow

Like a widow, grieving for the one that's lost. 

Sanity.

There are boys who know if their secret gets out,  they'll be called a wimp and be hated for simply showing an emotion that most don't understand.

There are boys, crying into their pillow and screaming for relief but no one can see this because if they do, the boy will never be a man.

Men are angry, not sad.

Men hurt others, not themselves.

Men must protect the rest and be strong and save the tears for the women and the children and fight with every last breath for their country.

So boys they stay.

Women need protected. 

But I proclaim with fists held high, 'NO!'

I'm so alone and your bullshit isn't helping.

I am a man because I am surviving despite the odds being favored in the opposite.

I cope in a way that's foreign to some

and like a racist you hate it because you can't understand it 

I'm not asking you to understand it.

I'm asking, I'm begging, I'm pleading for help.

Not help to stop.

Help to feel better so there's no need for this.

Self harm is like a drug.

Like a drug it is addictive

like a drug it effects every aspect of your life

like a drug it changes who you were into something you don't want to be.

Lying to the ones you love the most,

And it's terrifying to think of even going a few days without your fix

When I was born I was fragile but no one would hurt me

When I was six, playground upsets and a scraped knee.

When I was 13, falling out of trees and bullies

and now? 

Me.

So I may not be a typical man.

I may not fight others but I have a battle raging on inside.

A battle that is leaving me with scars but I'm alive

so I thrust my sword into the earth protesting death with every breath I take

I am a man.

It shouldn't matter if my skin breaks.

Reviews

[Laura Harrison]

So many people talk about girls who suffer from self harm, anorexia etc... but nobody acknowledges the boys who suffer, and as a woman, I am disgusted by this. I actually wrote a poem about it. Added this to my favourites :)

[generic twat]

I know! It's horrible, it feels like you don't exist... Thank you c: I will read it right now c: read moreI know! It's horrible, it feels like you don't exist... Thank you c: I will read it right now c:
ps- sorry for taking ages to reply to this, not been on due to lack of motivation haha

[Laura Harrison]

Thank you :)