My Angel

I have made so many mistakes in my life.
I hid from my shame and regret.
I tried to run from it, only finding myself in the same position.

Until i met you. you did not let me hide or run from it, you held me by the neck to face what i have done.
You made me realize... i believed in a me that did not exist an innocent version of me i created in my mind.
A version of me that i had lost growing up. I had to face who i was because of you.
The pain of it all causing me to mentally collapse.
If it wasn't for my emotions for you i would have gone insane, finding out what i was pretending to be and seeing who i really was mentally drove me to paranoia, doubt, and depression.
My emotions for you made me want to prove to you and myself that i can become who i choose to be not just physically but mentally.
Being as it was i was so caught up in myself i became blind to your conditions of loving me.
Your mental state only allowing you to force me to see and face my issues because you are unable to see and face your own.
I cannot understand how you can be such an impact on my life and i did nothing for yours.
You love me by wanting me to correct all of my faults simply because you are not able to do it for yourself.
You bring me down as you were brought down but lift me up as you want to be lifted.
I didn't see that, as i should have, as i should have loved you harder, tried to grow WITH you not just beside you.
 
When loving someone i hoped to have never been seen above them. i hoped to be equal in every way possible.
When i see that you only look at the outer layer of me and though i have grown to completely hate this trait of yours i want nothing more than to help you evolve your vision, and do so by staring so hard into those beautiful eyes trying to reach your soul.
Though i haven't yet, i know this could help you understand that when you look at me, you don't look at there outer layers which telling nothing but simply shows a mask, you look at my emotions my drive and much more.
Simply allowing what you see on the outer layer (the physicality, the complexion of a person) to allow that to evolve a hatred  and fear towards that person only brings despair and a weight no human should bare.