Battle Forfeit

Something I wrote when I was feeling good.

An ongoing battle deep inside me,
Waking each morning, not knowing,
Is this the day?
Or just another match between my lust and rage?
I remember fits of hysteria, where nothing could calm me,
Of sharp objects breaking the surface of old scars,
Of emotions going bezerk.

Then there were those days of peace, dry eyes and wonderment,
Of smiles and laughter,
Of being able to handle what was put in front of me.

It's a never ending battle that plays out inside me,
But I know if I keep the memories of past peace,
I'll be able to get through life easier.