I'll say sorry now.

how do I tell you that

when I say walls are up,

it means for everything

that even kissing you,

aches. and i don’t feel anything.

I’m glad to see you smiling

happy to see you

giggly.

but I am on the verge of suffocating.

 

 

I am stuck trying to make everyone

happy.

“so.. i mean, i dunno.. i just dont want to see him get hurt.

i dont mean to come off as rude or anything.”

Then... I guess he comes first?

What happened to being my friend,

over any boys and stupid stuff?

Do I even have any of those left?

 

I just need a single

“my friend first before some

love struck kid trying to fall

in my way” person.

 

I am falling apart

and no one is seeing it.

every day new scars are

making it out of my head

and onto my skin.

how do I survive this?

there is no one for me

to scream any of this at.

I am putting up bricks one

by one. slowly closing myself

in. Making no escape plans,

because the future terrifies me.

Tomorrow is too much.

I’d like to start over.

 

I don’t remember being dead

for those few minutes they

said I was. Would that

be what real-forever-dead

would feel like?

because I think I’d be all

for it.

 

 

Reviews

[kaycee]

i hate when this happens. i feel like it's always the friends who feel the most desperate that put their love interests before their friends and it's so sad.

I don't remember being dead
for those few minutes they
said I was. Would that
be what real-forever-dead
would feel like?
because I think I'd be all
for it.

this part was especially powerful. another lovely poem.

[Let Me Write]

Wow so first of all...we have the same name haha :D
Secondly, I have a best friend I've known since I was in kindergarten, (I'm a senior in high school now) and she has a boyfriend that she is in "love" with and she says they are going to get married and.....oh im getting off track anyways to put it simply...I know how you feel.
Thirdly,
" I am putting up bricks one
by one. slowly closing myself
in. Making no escape plans,
because the future terrifies me." Love this. Excellent job!