Down the Well.

Down the Well.

A Poem by i.am.the.sun.

*SPLASH*
HEY! - The f**k is that about? F**k you! What, where do you get off throwing.. What is this, gas? Are you throwing gas on me? GAS!? What, like you're going to burn me? Well f*****g DO it. What, are you scared? That's right you're scared, now f**k off! I'm already stuck down here, just leave me alone for f**k's sake.
Oh, you're back? Just couldn't stay away, just had to come look at the guy down the hole, didn't you? Did you bring any friends? No? Of course you didn't, who would be friends with someone like yo-
*SPLASH*
Oh, more gas, hey? I hope this is costing you a fortune, that way when I'm burning at least I'll know someone must have really wanted it! Wait, is this.. this is paint, isn't it? Well f**k, what are you trying to do? Actually though, what is it? Want me to drown in it? Are you hoping I look better if I'm all one colour? Maybe you're just trying to get rid of whatever was left over from when you painted a great big sign outside the top there, saying "COME F**K WITH THE GUY DOWN THE HOLE, FREE OF CHARGE!" Well? What is it? Hello? Nothing?
Do you even realize someone's down here? Is this just a regular thing for you? Is this some kind of a highway hypnosis kind of deal? Do you even know how you got here? Are you stupid? That's it, isn't it? You don't know how to do anything else, just dump paint down holes and-
*SPLASH*
Oh! Yeah! I'M RIGHT AREN'T I!? I guess I must have struck a cord with that stupid comment! Don't like being reminded that you're only good for one thing, huh? That the only thing you can do is piss people off? You must be real popular back where you come from. Where do you come from anyways? Wait, don't tell me. You probably come from somewhere that isn't too dry, maybe cool, definitely lots of shade, like, I don't know, maybe under a f*****g ROCK!? Yeah? Yeah, you're some kind of worm or beetle, that's just smart enough to be given a job to do, like deliver paint, and somewhere you still f**k it up!
*SPLASH*
HEY! I don't know what you're getting at with this, or if you can even understand me, but I hope you realize what you're doing - I can't stand anymore - do you understand? Hello- I can't f*****g stand anymore, I'm swimming, are you actually trying to kill me?
Look, I've tried to climb these walls before, I have, do you think I want to be down here? Of course not! I don't even remember how I got here! Maybe it was you - is that it? Are you here to finish the job? Why? What did I do? Did I hurt you? Someone else? Was I elected to be thrown down here? Am I just unlucky? Is there no real reason? F**k me, that's it. I'm just unlucky! I'm not even important enough for someone to WANT me to be down here? Has anyone noticed I'm gone?
*SPLASH*
-Hey!- Who ARE you? How did you find me here? Do you know who I am? Do you know why I'm here? Why are you doing this? Do you like seeing me like this- trying to stay afloat while you keep pouring s**t on me? Look, just leave me alone- can you do that? Do you know what that means? To be alone? You don't, do you? You probably have a whole crowd of friends up there laughing at me and bringing you paint - Yeah, still, what the f**k is up with all the paint? What is this - Red, red paint? What is that symbolic for you? No, probably just extra from some project, like, I don't know, ruining someone else's life. No one knows I'm down here do they? No one cares, so no one would pick something specifically for anything about any of this, would they? I'm just-
*SPLASH*
Look- I get it! You're going to drown me. I'm going to die. Down here. With no one. Not even a single person who listens to me - so at least let me f*****g pretend, alright? Let me at least pretend you can understand me, or that someone else up there can. Are you really that angry at me that you wont even let me die without interrupting me? What did I do to you? I don't remember! Was it this bad? Why don't you just actually kill me then!? Do you want it to take longer? Why not just leave me then? Look, I'm sorry for whatever I did, I must have been a real-
*SPLASH*
I'm SAYING I'm SORRY! That's why you're doing this, right!? So I realize my mistake? Maybe that would work if I remembered who I was before being down there! This has been my whole life - being stuck down here - at least, as far as I know. Just wondering where I am, why I'm here, and where everyone else is. Oh - and what I did to get here, thanks for reminding me about that. You know, I almost forgot about it - I was pretty distracted with just imagining what was outside of this hole. You know what I decided on? That it's not great. That once I get outside it's just a bunch of other holes to fall in. That it's too hot or too cold. That there are monsters out there. And that being down here is actually better. - So, thanks for reminding me that there are others - like you - who OBVIOUSLY find that life up there is preferable to being down there. Thanks, really, at least now I'm not living in a lie. At least now I'll know that when I die I'll have lived my whole life in a place no one wants to be, and that it really did suck as much as it felt like the whole time. Thanks. I really feel better now knowing the truth about I-
*SPLASH*
God damnit! You know, a little more and I'll be able to reach the top, right? If you keep just dumping me with paint I'm eventually going to crawl out of this thing. You really don't understand me, do you? Or do you just not care? Was I really put down here for no reason, and now I'm going to get out by just being lucky? Is my whole life just decided by the spaces left behind other people's decisions? Am I just a weed in your sidewalk? None of this meant anything to anyone, did it? No one cared I was down here. Did I just fall in? Was this all just an accident? Is that it? The worst thing to happen to me was for no reason at all? Do you think if I get out of here, - hey, is there anyone up there waiting for me? Am I just going to be put back down another hole? Please, I'm almost - I can almost reach the top-
*SPLASH*
Just a little more! It's too slippery to climb- I'm trying! Please, don't go, not now. I'm sorry for what I said earlier, I didn't understand.. Even if you don't mean to do this, thank you. Even if this is an accident. I never thought I'd have a chance at getting out of here. I tried so hard on my own. Even, even if you are the one who put me down there, I don't care, I forgive you, I just want out! I don't want to die down here, not alone, not missed by anyone, not already forgotten. Please, I'll owe you my life, I'll do anything for you, I'll move mountains! I don't know how, it'll probably take a long time, but I'll do it! I'll divert rivers to water gardens that will grow at your feet before the doors to the temple I'll build for you, so tall the sun will never set on it, please! Don't leave me here! Let me show you I'm worth saving! I mean, I don't know if you already have temples in your name, or maybe gardens more beautiful than I could grow, but I'll do my best, I'll try! Please, at least - I don't know... Anything you can ask I'll do my best to complete! Even, even if my best isn't good enough, just throw me back down here then. At least give me a chance up there!
...
Hello? Hello? Are you still there? Please, I'm so close... I can smell the air! It smells.. Oh! Is that you? Hello? Hel-
*SPLASH*
Yes! Almost- Yes, unng, there! Haha! Yes! Oh my GOD, THANK YOU! Thank you thank you again and again! Oh, I'm so sorry, I got so much paint on you! S**t, I'm so sorry, here, I'll.... I.. I don't know, I don't have anything to give you. I'm covered too, I can't really grab you anything without getting it covered too...
*HUG*
Oh... Oh god... Thank you... I'll never leave you unless you ask. Thank you.
You saved me.

© 2017 i.am.the.sun.


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Added on June 2, 2017
Last Updated on June 2, 2017

Author

i.am.the.sun.
i.am.the.sun.

Burnaby, Thugz mansion, Canada



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