Acceptance

A Story by Devil

To whom it may concern...

To the woman who was supposed to give me unconditional love, the person that was supposed to make all those rainy days brighter …

You stole my understanding of what love was supposed to be. Because of your lack of self awareness I grew up thinking the world was as cold as you lead it on to be, that relationships were built on transactions. That when you speak to someone you love, you’re supposed to cut them down with the words that hurt them the most. You taught me that love is supposed to be vindictive. SPITEFUL. Those who you love most, must hurt before they leave, because the pain they cause has to be reciprocated. You taught me that feelings were mine to deal with, and that there was no outlet for how I felt.

YOU taught me that anything that I valued ( GAMEBOYS ) would be taken from me, that if I grew attached to things I would lose it. You taught me to thrive in chaos, that when things were at their quietest that I should be skeptical of peace. I remember those nights where things felt normal, only to be abruptly thrown around in the back seat of a moving car as you chased someone down. You taught me so many things; How hard has it been to forget these life lessons…

I grew up in a place with 4 walls, accompanied by the glow and stories of 32” inch zenith TV. As you stole my innocence, I held on to dreams of becoming nothing like you. I remember making vows as I cried alone that I would never be like you. How Funny I believed early on that I could easily escape the cycle you set me up so nicely to follow, that the gravity it holds wasn’t as strong as my own will power.

SIGH…and yet I forgive you …