DARK

for competition Phobia ................ Fear of the dark still exists cannot sleep without the light on and that is the easy bit - others areas are much worse and all related to the dark

Dark

 

"Click"

Sudden blinding blackness

…………….DON’T MOVE

 

Shadows move

……………DON’T MAKE A SOUND

 

Darkness takes form

……………..DON’T BREATHE

 

Ghostly shimmer takes shape

……………..DON’T LOOK

 

Cold clammy air - suffocating

…………….SCREAM NO! ..... DON’T

 

 

Can’t breath

……………….DON’T CRY

 

Perspiration

Dripping

Pooling

Wet!

WET FEET

..........WET PANTS

......................WET CHEEKS

 

 

It’s dark in here

 

…………….PLEASE LET ME OUT

I’m sorry I didn’t mean to! I’m afraid of the dark

………. I hate being locked

…………………………….Under the stairs.

 

 

©Copyright 12 March 2008

Author's Note

my punishent for being naughty was to be locked in a cupboard under the stairs with no light- am still petrified of the dark.............

Reviews

[Vesa Lee]

Wonderfully expressed.
These simple words unlocked my past remembrances of the dark and it's horrors; real or imagined.
Startling and powerful.
Very well done.

[Candle in the wind]

Oh god its a horrid nightmare! its so sad that you had to go through this. The darkness will never submerge your spirit as your creativity shines through!

[Pinky]

omg i am soooo sry tht tht happened to u.... as a parent i cud never think about doing tht to one of my children.... Wow its aweome piece!!!! I still need a nitelite.... and i am 28 so.... dont feel bad!

[badgirl beth]

agree with the review by ruabanrion...you have captured the terror or your experience well.

[Ruabanrion]

I don't blame you!
I think you really captured the feeling well.

[Tania Leigh]

Jen, this is, hands down, the most intense write of yours....the last two lines packed quite a punch.

Your cleverly placed font emphasized all of the "don'ts" well.

Great write! Thank you for entering the contest!

[Antony]

Jen the format you used added much to your words, you brought the fear right to the page, picture perfect, a really good job.
Tony