In Defiance

Poem of hope and endurance.

In defiance I hold,

I reach through blankest, blackest space with open eyes.

In defiance I push toward the farthest pulp of the universe,

And, touching its boundary, penetrate beyond.

I endure.

 

In defiance I wake,

I remain.

Holding breath and brain, shaking, I spiral to the core.

Deep-rooted, splendorous heartache that I am,

In defiance I stand.

 

Shall you know me?

Shall I be seen?

Whose vision peers behind the sheath that separates day from dream?

Who hears the melody of demise, yet sings the tunes of lullabyes,

In defiance still, I rise.

Reviews

[Joan Spahr, Soul Poetry]

There is no such thing as fashion in art. You can like it or not, but style is style, modern or traditional. Staid? Good...that's what defiant means. I am solemn, but more than that I write from wretched determination to expose the tremendous amount of fortitude and will, sheer will, that it takes to hold your ground against the forces seeking to overwhelm you, drown you, unseat you and keep you down. Have you struggled for your very existence, for the right to exist? Not for a little while, but for a lifetime. I imagine most people have not been where I've been and may not be able to recognize life hard-fought, every day, day in day out...drama gets old, it becomes matter of fact survival, without elegance or poetry, just the choice of digging yourself into the ground and daring to exist, or floating away. I will not relinquish, though it would be so much easier. In defiance, I submit, I remain.

[Trigorin]

Not bad, but it comes across as a little staid and old-fashioned, where I think your intention was to make it solemn. There's a note of solemnity, yes, but I think you've overdone it a little with some of the language you've used. The concept is good and your writing is good, it's just I'm not getting what I think you want me to get out of this piece. Just food for thought.