I Wish I Knew

An 8 year old boy wonders why is abusive dad abandoned him and his mom. Was it his fault? Mom's fault? What could we have done different? Boys grows up to be a fine young university grad.

"I Wish I Knew"

The reasons for your departure escape me. The thought of finding out frightens me.

The idea of your return, while sporadic and unrealistic, warms my heart, gives me strength and keeps me from falling apart. For I know, that in this world, I will one day play your part.

As I look at your photo, I see my reflection. Without direction, my heart races and like a snare drum, beats rapidly, sending through my apparent fearless being, a fiery rush of fear, the same feeling I felt, every time you were near.

My time has come and my cue is near. On this day, as I prepare to walk, my excitement has finally conquered my fear. My heart, fearlessly beating, guides me up the steps, that

thanks to you, were once my greatest fear.

As I 'walk the walk', I look at the ocean of proud beings, all while wishing you were here. Best of all, I do this without a single thought of fear.

I wish I knew.

End:::

© 2013 Jose Alfredo Silva

Author's Note

Your input will be greatly appreciated. I have an audio version of this poem on my YouTube Channel: www.youtube.com/allcitypix. Here is the link: http://youtu.be/7-aM81jRx5A