Unmade Relationship

Love.  It can make you happy.  It can make you sad.  Love can actually give you so many different kinds of emotions.  The first time you fall in love, the feeling you get is unforgettable.  You would never forget your first love and how you felt about them.  Especially if you had really good memories with that special someone.  That’s me right there.  She brought me so much happiness and at the end, she got me sad like a baby crying for its bottle.  Trying to find the right one, all the emotions you go through, having so much memories, and the talks that would completely change everything is what a typical teenager would face through.

This world contains over millions of people.  Knowing that one of all those millions would be married to is incredible.  There is someone in this planet that would love to have you on their side.  Maybe you haven't encountered that person but soon enough, you would find them.  Probably you already have but you just don’t know.  You never know what the future holds for you.  When I first saw her, I just knew inside me that one day I’ll be able to call her mine.  The way her eyes looked at me with her glasses was unexplainable.  “I’m open!” shouted my teammate.  He shoots and….. “GOOOOOOOAAAAL!” the whole team shouted with excitement.  I first noticed her in my gym class.  She was the goalie for the other team.  When I had the chance to kick for a goal, I would just kick it slowly.  I didn’t want her to get hurt.  One day she actually blocked a shot without even looking.  Everyone laughed especially me on how funny it looked.  My friend was next to me and I had to get some advice.  “Hey Tony?” I said.  “What you need?” responded Tony.  “You see that girl that is being goalie for the other team?” “Yes, what about her?” “Don’t tell no one but I think she’s pretty, very pretty” “Talk to her and get to know her better, you might actually have a chance”.  “You’re right, I’ll talk to her”.  I knew it from the start.  I had a good feeling I had found the right one.  So many people in this world and I wanted her.

These feelings you get aren’t able to be described.  You fall in love with someone, you are going to forget about everything and just focus in that specific someone.  Concentrating in something would be the biggest challenge because it would be impossible.  When you face through this, you know you are catching feelings for someone.  Every time I would see her, I would get butterflies in my stomach and it’s normal to get this type of feelings.  When I first saw her, it was like the world stopped for a moment.  We will talk and she would just bring me so much joy.  She would get so shy and blush and it would be so adorable.  Even though right after I would talk to her, my friends would ask me why my face got so red.  Emotions start to go through your mind when you think about them.  It varies on how you look at it.  Every day, I would think about her nonstop.  She was going to become my everything to me.  If I lost her, even though we aren’t in a relationship, I would completely fall into pieces.

Adults think that we as teenagers are still young to even actually fall in love with someone and be so close to them.  We might not be together as marriage but we do develop strong emotions for each other like a married couple.  When you develop this certain emotions with a specific someone, you have maybe find the right person.  These strong feelings and emotions start to be exchanged.  This starts to build up memories.  Not just any memories, but memories that you lived with someone special.  “WE ARE THE MUSTANGS, THE MIGHTY MIGHTY MUSTANGS!” screamed the crowd with pride.  A cloud formed around the field with the smell of pizza.  I wanted to spend time with her and that’s what I did.  We sat right next to each at the homecoming game.  The laughter we will trade.  I loved making her laugh.  Her smile is the cutest thing I’ve ever seen.  We were like little kids being trouble makers.  She got skittles and she would throw one by one a piece of Skittles to the crowd.  We would laugh when the person that got hit by the Skittles would turn around with a confused face.  We just asked for trouble.  My favorite song comes up when a team scores.  “Treasure that is what you are” I sang, “I know” she responded.  I looked at her and she looks at me and we exchanged smiles.  She would wrap my arms around me and I didn’t care.  We watched the game together with so much joy.  “I see my brother! Cover your face” she said with fear.  I covered my face with her book bag fast as possible with fear also.  I didn’t know what was going to happen but nothing bad happened.  I was so relieved.  Our first hug occurred after the game.  I didn’t want to let her go.

Talks with someone is common but it depends on what you talk about.  It can be funny but sometimes it can be serious.  The talks I had with her were very casual like how was her day and stuff like that.  One day, she actually opened up to me that she liked me.  We were having a normal conversation and she just brought it up.  “It’s like a dream come true” I responded when she told me.  We both actually liked each other.  I could feel my heart pumping on how amazing news she gave me.  From that moment on, I knew one day I would call her mine but it didn’t end up how I wanted it to be.  “Just ask her out already… you guys make such a cute couple”, said everyone about us.  I knew I had to make a move and I actually planned everything out.  The carnival arrived at my city and I wanted to have a good time with her.  If things looked right, I would have asked her to be my girlfriend.  I was ready to ask her but her tone was different on how she typed.  She seemed so uninterested in talking to me.  Something was up so I talked to her best friend and I asked her if her friend actually liked me and she responded by saying that I should give her friend space. I didn’t know what to do.  I was thinking of the worst things that could happen to us.  She finally opened up to me saying that she didn’t have feelings for me anymore.  “What did I do wrong?” I asked.  “You didn’t do anything wrong Jose” she replied.  I couldn’t believe it.  It felt so perfect to be with her but now it can’t happen.  Falling for her was a mistake I’ll gladly repeat.  A guy grabbed her attention but that guy wasn’t me.

A single life can bring you so many adventures and one specific adventure is love.  Trying to find the right one, all the emotions you go through, having so much memories, and the talks that would completely change everything is what a typical teenager would face through.  Love blinds you completely.  You like someone and you just fight so they would like you back.  You want to do something but you think it’s going to be a bad choice when maybe it’s not.  He or she is the first thing you think of every morning and the last thing that stays on your mind every night.  That’s when you are in love.  The thing is, everything might not gone your way.  That’s exactly what happened to me.  I thought she was mine but I was completely wrong.  We liked each other and we lived memories together.  I saw her like the perfect girl.  She was a beautiful, funny, caring person.  I might not find another girl like her but I know soon someday I would.  Now it’s just like we never met.  I see her smile while she talks with some other guy and knowing that I’m not the one causing that smile breaks me.  She actually liked me.  It was like a dream come true, ending up into a nightmare.

Hear my soul speak. Of the very instant that I saw you, Did my heart fly at your service.

                                   -William Shakespeare

*Written 10/20/14