Hope: A Symphony in 4 Movements

a poem about wanting to be with one of your best friends romantically, but knowing that it wont happen, and that being okay. wow i promise im better at writing poetry than i am at writing descriptions

Hope is a rubber ring on a lazy river.

you hold on, not even that tight,

and the current takes you where you need to go.

but what do you do when your rubber ring has a puncture,

and the water stops moving?

it's so easy to let yourself stop.

think, there's nothing here to keep you moving anymore.

think, you might as well sink.

Breathe

It's been a long time since we met.

the first time, I don't even think we said a word to each other,

but i remember thinking,

huh? she looks interesting.

over the years you became my favourite 'what if?'

I convinced myself we were supposed to be

together,

like a 2am whiskey and an exasperated sigh.

I remember once,

telling a friend that I was sweet on you,

and watching the light in her eyes beam,

like headlight on a country road.

She must have thought, like me,

that we were made for each other.

But if you drive for long enough on a country road,

you eventually get back to the city.

the car is parked now,

and the headlights don't think of us anymore.

It's been a long time since we dated.

just two kids,

who didn't know what they were doing,

maybe only trying because our friends wanted us to.

it didn't last,

 but our friendship did.

fast forward to the first time i saw you in a dress.

the room was empty,

but for your smile.

sober and suited, i stuttered and slurred,

just to say,

wow.

the rest of that night went badly for me.

so bad, I think I should have just stayed home.

The water,

seems to be getting deeper now.

I can feel it's cool ring around my throat.

There's no inflatable saviour to get me to the end of the river,

so i start kicking.

swimming.

I don't need hope of us to ride out the waves,

I can make it on the thought of what we do have, alone.

I know you are waiting at the end of the river.

you are still in my future,

maybe not in the way I wanted,

but, goddamn, will I be happy to see you.

Author's Note

thanks for reading