Bad Gnome Rising

They keep dragging me back.

No consideration of debts paid.

All I want is my quiet.

Makes me want to fly away.

Gasping breath grows closer.

Stone smile spreads.

  

Least he gets some exercise.

Hear a cough,

 and a spit.

"Take that with you."

I enjoy being still.

Just to be honest,

  I tend to be lazy.

It takes effort.

"Why are you hear?"

While he drones away,

 I will take a moment,

   and explain something.

Just because I look like a sculpture on the side of a cathedral,

 does not mean I ignore the world around me.

Tortoise and I play backgammon on occasion.

"I don't know what happened...."

Nope.

  Forget it.

    Enough is enough.

Moving.

Found a nice little spot.

Even made a Buckingham guard flinch.

Reviews

[Lorry]

Sounds to me Jon, that there is far more to the common garden gnome than meets the eye.
I've got the lazy bit down to a T, but keeping track of them all must be a nightmare.

[Jon Roggie]

One is bad enough.

[Ana Papaya]

Rascally gnomes. I wonder why toy story never had one?
So much potential for mischief.

[Jon Roggie]

All we got was Gnomeo and Juliet.
Hi there! Hope you are well!
Since I like a touch of the absurd,
and am willing to accept the suggestions,
where should our gargoyle friend have decided to roost?

[Ana Papaya]

Gnome and Juliet was cute. I'm very well, thanks.
He'd find a fine roost in the oval office? Maybe. Keep on eye on things.

[Jon Roggie]

That would be a very long flight. However,
I do wonder if anyone would ask him to move!
read moreThat would be a very long flight. However,
I do wonder if anyone would ask him to move!

[Ana Papaya]

They'd probably just treat him like an object.

[Jon Roggie]

Now, I am picturing a press conference, and how they are trying to ignore him.

[Ana Papaya]

I would name him Clay and his ideas would be concrete.

[Ted Kniffen]

They are not to be trusted, are they?
Hanging about the gardens ... hidden in the shrubbery ... smiling like idiots.

What's a gnome to do?

I like the laughing going on in the background.

[Jon Roggie]

Someone, somewhere, needs a laugh.
Doesn't matter the day,
or the season.
I also get to sound like a complete lunatic!