Inner Narrative Gossip

Arguing with oneself about the newly pressing issue of gossip.

Something came up that has occurred to me before. I've actually thought a lot about it, but I've never really had it apply to me.

Gossip.

It hurts.

And I don't know why I care... well I don't care.

That's a lie. Of course I care.

I've been involved in gossip circles before- who hasn't? I never really contributed, but I'd agree that so-and-so acts like a jerk sometimes, or yeah, it seems like they like another so-and-so. I've never initiated it. I've never actively sought out a way to channel my negative feelings toward someone through bragging to someone about something awful they did.

I have, however thought about what they talk about when I'm not there. I don't do anything the people they talk about do. I blend in the background. No one cares if I wear a clashing green scarf, or if I have a day of giving everyone the finger.

Well, I'd never actually wear a green scarf- that'd be way to bold, and shoot me if I'm ever selfish enough to give someone the finger because I'm having a bad day.

And through second hand gossiping (talking about what you overheard someone else gossiping about), I don't think people gossip about me. I seriously give them no reason. I'm boring. I don't do anything they'd be interested in.

Okay, that was a conversation I had with myself last year.

And I've changed.

I'm more sociable, now.

I think I'm still nice... ish.

But I'm more sociable, so that means I'm making friends. These friends look out for me. We... talk. Which is nice. We don't gossip, or not often, or it's not bad when we do. We don't put other people down because we freak'n have a conscience.

Is it wrong, then, to state your opinion about someone to someone you trust? Of course that's okay. That's what friendship is. However... I'm having a moral dilemma.

I overheard something, and it's getting to me… were they being a jerk, or just being comfortable with their friends?

Author's Note

It's an odd ending, I know. Any suggestions?