dakota

The first time I saw her face

 

I knew that the part of me

 

Everyone told me was broken

 

Everyone told me was unnatural

 

Wasn’t.

 

The first time I saw the curve of her face

 

Of her body

 

Of her smile

 

I knew.

 

The world was broken,

 

She was whole.

 

And if I could only touch her

 

I could be whole too.

 

I loved her when I saw her

 

Instantaneous

 

Combustion.

 

I loved her as she walked away.

Reviews

[I AM]

"old poem about a girl i loved."
Ehm. I'm against this, no offense. But let's just not talk about it. Let's talk about your poem.

This poem is very honest and innocent. You show what you feel through all the senses. For me, it's like you want to tell the world that you're still the same although you have a different way of love. I like every word you use to describe your feeling.

This is good. Keep up your good work. :)

[cellardork]

thank you. :) i appreciate you looking past your beliefs and seeing the writing. that takes a great person. :)

[Lily Mae]

I always get caught up in the moment..sensing the depth of emotion in the way a writer describes the love and admiration for that someone special.. then the last line slams the heart.. :) well done.. it had a great impact. Painful honesty.. Well done..xo

[cellardork]

thank you for my first ever review, and such a lovely one. i love what ive read of yours. :)

[Lily Mae]

I like that I was the first :) and your a great writer so keep them coming..xo and Thank you for the wonderful comment..xo