murdering the silence

my sunday (every sunday)

Quietly I wake up and slip out of bed. I know I will have a couple hours to be alone with my coffee and my quiet. I qietly slide the glass door and tip toe outside to breath in the morning air and sit to sip my coffee. I light a cigarette and sigh. The morning is so lovely and quiet out of my patio. A squirrel plays in the tree. The breeze blows gently on my face as I relax and gaze at nothing in particular.

I take another long draw of my cigarrette and blow out the smoke, watching it sift thru the screen of the patio. It wafts away in  the breeze. I sip my coffee and close my eyes tasting the bitter and the sweet mixing together in my mouth. I smile. No noise only nature. I hear the leaves russel in the nabors yard and think to myself that it must be the nabors dog. I smile. I think if my husband asleep still in the oh so comfortable bed looking so peaceful and quiet. I think of my girls sleeping with their peaceful cherubic faces all smooth and free of worry. I smile.

I finish my cigarrette and take another sip of my coffee I think to myself that the world is so peaceful and quiet. however it is getting hot here now early in the morning, so I get up and stretch and pick up my cup. I slide the door open again and sneak in before the cat can notice the door is open. The cat's all come running in a false greeting. Their bowls are empty. "Hmph, Well now I know why you love me so rotten kitties" I say to them as they escort me to the pantry where there prize is hidden.  I open the pantry and grab the bag of food. "Is this what you want?" they meow in unison and dance around.  I move them out of the way and fill their bowls. Giving them each a pat on the head. I stand creekily and my knees pop.

I go to fill my coffee again and shake my head at the sink of dishes. I think to myself how these people I love who lie sleeping would surely die of filth or starvation if I were to not exist. I decide to not worry with it yet and go to sit at the table and drink more coffee. I get out my laptop and check my email and myspace and other nonsense I am party to. Quiet. Only quiet and the gentle tapping of my fingers on the keys. ahh I think this is a good sunday.

Suddenly the bedroom door creaks open. Out steps Hubby rubbing his eyes. I smile at him. He winks back and sits on the couch. We have quiet conversation. Not too much but just enough. we sit quietly. No tv, no music, no noise. we smile at each other.

Then it happened. The oldest one wakes up. She started talking to him quietly at first. then messing around and being giggly and loud. "SHHH someone is still asleep" I say. They stop for a minit then start up again. "SHHHH" they look at me like I have two heads. Hubby turns on the TV and the silence was murdered. My blessed quiet day became a wave of chaotic noise filled disenchantment. I heave a heavy sigh of mourning. I look at him in dispair as he stares at the noisey killer of my peaceful morning.

I sigh again and go outside and close the glass door heavily and light another smoke. I am sad that the quiet is gone and now have to deal with the inane babbling and requests for things. I smoke my cigarrette and stare at the nothing I stared at earlier feeling the heat of the midmorning beating down. Why does sunday morning have to end in noise? Why does the silence have to be murdered? 

 

Author's Note

anyone else feel my pain here???

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