Red Eyes on Orange Horizons

I found a haven against the nape of your neck as I pressed my cheek against it.
but these fears - -
they go beyond
the uncomfortable warm sensation of tears in my eyes
or the goosebumps clamoring up my arms
the biting cold climbing up my vertebrae.

What are we doing, exactly? Where is this going?
I'm tired of this little dance, tired of grasping for
answers.
truth.
some sort of stability in this.
Is it over yet?

I'm still unsure of your intentions.
You did always have a sweet tooth for revenge.
And it hurts. It does.
I have forgotten how to differentiate between
the good and the bad churning in my guts.

I may be losing my mind.
I may be obsessed.
Maybe I'm just a little insane.
Maybe I just forgot to breathe.