one year later

i was going through my old journal entries and found the entry about this event.

i watched the excuses fall out your mouth, like a magician's trick handkerchief and land in a pile at your feet. actions that should have been so simple and easy to avoid, moment after moment that should have had a consideration and you jumped in full force and never looked back. i brushed off signs like a swarm of noisy mosquitos, thinking my gut feeling was unfounded, that everything was fine, it was just one of those days. i went to sleep hungry, too ill inside to eat. it took less than a six pack for you to come clean and yet i'm the one who walked away feeling dirty. each stumbled over sentence increased my anger, as i watched you build up stories to cover your a*s. i lost track of the "sorrys" and "forgive mes" because i was too distracted from sorting fact and fiction. i felt myself lose control when i was asked, "can we still be friends?" instead of lashing out, i left you at the patio table, waiting for a reply the same way i was left so many times, in limbo, the last minute before dates. i've found it's easier to be alone. no disappointment hanging above me. so much so, i'd rather be the naive girl with too much love in her head than the one who who made her this way.

Reviews

[Deborah Leah Krempa]

Very well written and sad poem. Hope things are better for you this year. Prayers to you. Thank you for sharing. Debileah