what my pen can write in 7 minutes

what my pen can write in 7 minutes

A Poem by lostnstars

the devastating state whenever i go home
straight to look up new music and lyrics
to just open a goddamn conversation with you

every post it notes with little notes i see
every one of them always ends up reminding me 
of you
every song i hear on the radio got me
narrating myself and yourself asking
where this is going to

i dreamed about you again last night
you were in casuals and with friends 
who you thought were the right friends
the other dream, what was it again?
i don't remember much of it
but i'm sure you were holding my hand
and i just knew that what i felt was home
home

boys i could've loved 
standing on the doorstep
but slowly i closed
all my doors
because once,
finally,
i made up my mind

i couldn't stand the chance i lose
whenever i turn around
and you're nowhere to be found
"i don't feel loved" 
is just yourself blindly seeing
anything that could possibly happen

i wrote you a thousand 
one to two unfinished lines,
one to two unfinished stanzas,
one to two unfinished lyrics
now i'm writing you a
one to two- God knows if this poem
will be left unfinished

i'm getting tired of me
searching for the right, light, true
lyrics
to show you my signals

tonight, my pen is screaming ink
my heart is screaming for something
i honestly don't know what it wants

might see me sitting here
acting like i know what's going on,
pretending that i know nothing
now, i'm laying down here
pretending that i know what's going on
acting like i don't know what to write
anymore

that sunken feeling 
when you say goodnight
because, feeling of 
tiredness and problems
are washing off with our 
meaningful and meaningless
conversations
"goodnight" 
you'll wake up when the sun rise,
i'll think 'till i fall asleep
when it's sunrise

is this what they call falling?
cuz it seems familiar,
but feels unfamiliar

something new, probably.

© 2018 lostnstars


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Added on August 27, 2017
Last Updated on August 21, 2018

Author

lostnstars
lostnstars

About
writing is either my getaway or home more..

Writing
genuine genuine

A Poem by lostnstars