Let Me Fall ( the cliff I stand)

Let Me Fall ( the cliff I stand)

A Poem by lyricalprince
"

This is another personal short poem that I wrote. Warning it has some profanity PLEASE REVIEW!

"
Let Me Fall (The Cliff I Stand)

My time has come let go of my hand
And let me fall off the cliff I stand
Don't fell sad for me don't even try
Because you're the one who feel my head with all these lies
How life is wonderful, how it's sweet
How you will enjoy everyone you meet
How life is sacred, how life is swell
Well guess what my life is a living hell
I am a loner-
A outcast
A monster
And a freak
I am the mute who never speaks
I am a mistake my life is full of regret
I am the ghost who everyone forgets
I am made fun of and everybody knows
But they do nothing and help make fun of -
My Head
My ears
My voice
And my nose
So I've made a decision
I won't stand here and watch you as you make fun of-
My thoughts
My feelings
And my religion
So today is the day I decide I'm in command
Today I fall off the cliff I stand

© 2013 lyricalprince


Author's Note

lyricalprince
Please tell me what you think!

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Featured Review

In all honesty I thought it would have had a happier ending. If one truly does not care what another thinks, they surely would not end their life.

I think the flow worked and you worked well with the rhymes, however it could have just been so with a free verse (I don't do poetry and I'm not very good at it and when I use rhyme, I sound like a child). However you made it work even when a couple of times I felt it cheesy with the rhyming.

Also a person with a religion that is strong and powerful has strength in Jesus Christ (at least with all forms of Christianity) and would have the understanding that the people that hurt them are hurt themselves and instead of letting their negativity destroy them, they'd be positive and uplifting to help others from the torment and struggles of negative energy. It's a struggle we all face and bullying is one of the worst forms because it's a person living in a negative environment and projecting it onto others, mostly those weaker or as weak as they are.

I guess I wish it would have had a happier ending... but props on the job well done!

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

lyricalprince

7 Years Ago

no u don't understand what I meant by "today I fall off the cliff is stand" that line was metaphoric.. read more
Amanda Dawn Sanderson-Greer

7 Years Ago

In that case, kudos! And my apologies as I'm not a poetry reader or writer and know nothing of meta.. read more



Reviews

In all honesty I thought it would have had a happier ending. If one truly does not care what another thinks, they surely would not end their life.

I think the flow worked and you worked well with the rhymes, however it could have just been so with a free verse (I don't do poetry and I'm not very good at it and when I use rhyme, I sound like a child). However you made it work even when a couple of times I felt it cheesy with the rhyming.

Also a person with a religion that is strong and powerful has strength in Jesus Christ (at least with all forms of Christianity) and would have the understanding that the people that hurt them are hurt themselves and instead of letting their negativity destroy them, they'd be positive and uplifting to help others from the torment and struggles of negative energy. It's a struggle we all face and bullying is one of the worst forms because it's a person living in a negative environment and projecting it onto others, mostly those weaker or as weak as they are.

I guess I wish it would have had a happier ending... but props on the job well done!

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

lyricalprince

7 Years Ago

no u don't understand what I meant by "today I fall off the cliff is stand" that line was metaphoric.. read more
Amanda Dawn Sanderson-Greer

7 Years Ago

In that case, kudos! And my apologies as I'm not a poetry reader or writer and know nothing of meta.. read more
I loved it, it was powerful and uplifting. My favorite line was "Because you're the one who feel my head with all these lies". Simply Brilliant.

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

lyricalprince

7 Years Ago

thank you I really appreciate it
This is a very well-written poem! I spotted a few typos, but other than that, it was a great poem - very powerful, and I love the way you rhyme!
Keep up the good work, and keep writing!
~Andromeda

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

A good read and write...Thank you for penning...:)

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

lyricalprince

7 Years Ago

thanks i really appreciate it!
Sami Khalil

7 Years Ago

You are welcome...:)
Dude? You write from my point of view.

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Silent Wolf

7 Years Ago

Thanks, although I am not very religious, I thank you for your words. I am now on depression medicin.. read more
Amanda Dawn Sanderson-Greer

7 Years Ago

It's okay because religion is a scary thing and hard to decipher the good from the bad but I can ass.. read more
Silent Wolf

7 Years Ago

Thank you. I shall remember that. :) k
this is great! very real i like it hun!

Posted 7 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.


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Added on June 27, 2013
Last Updated on June 29, 2013
Tags: teen, anger, spoken word, dark

Author

lyricalprince
lyricalprince

VA



About
I'm just a normal 18 year old who is still struggling with depression. I created this account because I feel that my personal experiences will help others break free of the chains of depression. more..

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