fatherly advice

leaning close, your watery, bloodshot eye
attempts to focus, yet fails each time.
your breath belies a day spent working,
as your sterile, whisky soaked breath
chokes my senses.
each word, you force upon my ears,
expelling the horrors of death, your death,
how one day you will not be here,
how your own father, my unknown grandfather, 
declined, passed away.
but rather than fatherly advice or comforting words,
you seem intent on drawing tears.
and when finally, the tears do fall,
your befuddled state confuses 
their meaning and their source.

Reviews

[Benita-Staebell M - Kin..]

I did Enjoy how you penned this.


I loved it and I know many
can relate to this my own Dad was a great father
for awhile and he started falling down hill and got
addicted to Alcohol so life can be hard but I really
loved this thank you for sharing your true and raw emotions.


all we can do is heal and for give them in our own
time but we don't have to excuse their actions
and pray for them that Is what I had to do with my dad :)
but it Taught me to not drink but it made me strong as he still
drinks.


Thank you for sharing this write and for
leaving kind review and comments on my
page.

Blessings. Benita

[Christopher Withers]

Thank you for taking the time to review Benita :). My Dad was a different person when caught up in drink, he pretty much drank himself to death (perhaps another poem.) This was a wake up call for him and he asked for help. It took many years to accept he was trying, and now that I'm older, I can see him as a person with flaws, rather than seeing a father through the eyes of a child. I has helped me to understand.

[Benita-Staebell M - KindredPoet]

yes it does it makes us stronger as well :) it has me it took me maybe once I grew up my mid 30's I am 35 now but god revealed to me things that were hidden and I learned why he went that way I always loved him but was painful I learned pain and love Tough love but my heart healed as it almost broke up my marriage as Daddy was my first word so it was hard but in time we understand I guess I have always been so loving and Tender hearted it hits you hard but I am very forgiving also I am thankful to god for the love he puts in my heart. yes well mine left he didn't want to pull us down I pray that he will wake up and god keeps reaching his heart I am still in contact with my father and I understand his pain more now he apologized to me but I still feel he will drink but I have hope and pray for him I had my mother Grandpa his father and my older siblings Sister and brother but the pain was still there I still loved him was like you hurt so much that you love them :) but I am happy for you and you're very welcome. Life teaches us many lesions they may not always be ones we want I felt that way about my experience with my dad but I wouldn't change a thing it made me stronger as god has given me a stronger heart so I don't get hurt as easily :). yes the Alcohol can change a person where we don't know them anymore. thank you for sharing your story and memories. blessings Benita

[hardeep sabharwal]

a beautiful poem,, emotional and has an appeal,, I feel many of us can relate ourselves with this,,
nice job

[jacob erin-cilberto]

my dad has been really looping a lot now....but i am lucky...he still insists on fatherly advice and not trying to make me cry for him...

this poem is quite moving.

[Christopher Withers]

Thank you your review Jacob :)

[MomzillaNC]

The möbius loop of guilt… like an overseer's whip, driving us to actions we don't want to take.

[Christopher Withers]

A positive thing about my upbringing is that it really made me aware of the effect, even seemingly innocuous actions of a parent, can have on a child. Now that I am a father, I try to be conscious of all my actions, so as not make the same mistakes.

[MomzillaNC]

Same here.

[Christopher Withers]

I'm not sure how widely you read, but a book I found very interesting was written by Stanislav Grof called 'LSD: Doorway to the Numinous'. He used LSD therapy to regress "untreatable" mental health cases to the source of their issues. It sort of touches on the idea I mentioned above above where seemingly innocent actions or events plant a seed which is added to over a lifetime, manifesting in behavioural and mental health issues. It's well worth a read for people interested in these subjects :).

[MomzillaNC]

I do read quite a bit. I haven't read that particular treatise. I'll have to remember to take a look at it the next time I cart my kid to the library. :D

[Derrick Bower]

I really enjoyed this poem! I think everyone can relate in some way or another to these sorts of guilt trips, though maybe not quite to this degree. You managed to capture all of the feelings of confusion and guilt and sadness as well as some physical descriptions of the father-the ones that tell us all we really need to know. You have a great skill, and I'll certainly check out the rest of your work!

[Christopher Withers]

Thanks you :)

The "difficulty" for me is, my Dad is now a changed man (not touched a drop of alcohol for many years), but at the peak of his drinking... wow, a hundred pieces could be produced from that. As I aged and realised he was just a man with his own troubles and issues, I didn't exactly forgive his actions, but I could at least appreciated them in a different light.

[Beccy]

Sadness and longing are indelibly stamped on this poem. Childhood shapes us, but sometimes memory is best left behind.

Beccy.

[Emma-Jane]

Beautiful poem that captures a emotion perfectly. I really enjoyed the flow of the poem and I particularly loved the line 'as your sterile, whisky soaked breath chokes my senses.'

[A. Amos]

Elegantly crafted and enjoyed the essence of your poetry...well done!

[Christopher Withers]

Thank you for taking time to feed back :).

[Matching Socks]

This was incredibly moving Christopher.

[Christopher Withers]

Thank you :)

This is pretty much the only poem I've written of my childhood - I should probably writ more. There's a lot of suppressed stuff there though, so it might tend towards melancholy(!)

[Matching Socks]

Some of my best poetry but worst memories come from that place.
Some good memories peppered through out too. Yes, you should highly recommend it.

[thewholesoul]

heavy and personal. well written. it kept me interested all the way through.

[Christopher Withers]

Thank you thewholesoul :).