Democracy tried to kill me...

A Story by Opie

A true story. The dangers of voting and loose rocks.

It’s taken me a couple weeks to get this all down, writing notes and typing have been a problem lately.

When you ride a motorcycle to work most days and suddenly show up with your arm in a sling people will make assumptions. They will ask you for the story behind your injury with concern in their voices, if not always in their hearts. Some of them do this because they told you you’d get hurt driving that deathtrap and they can’t wait to be proven right. Some others want to hear of your misery as an inroads to tell you of their own oh so similar experiences which are obviously much worse than whatever you are dealing with. A very few others are actually concerned and hope for a good story.

I am here to disappoint them all.

On Election day I got in my car because it was cold and dark and I didn’t feel like digging out all my cold weather riding gear. I went to work, crunched some data, ate some lunch, replied to emails and went home. On the way I stopped at my local polling place to do my civic duty. I parked the car at the high school parking lot and followed the crowd headed in to do right by Democracy. It was a good crowd and the narrow sidewalk was full of comers and goers. One of the comers in front of me recognized one of the goers headed in the other direction and they stopped to chat as neighbors are want to do.

This is where it all went wrong.

As the people ahead stopped to talk, other folks start to move around them, but they soon ran out of sidewalk. Some spilled into the roadway a bit, others went around on the grass. I was looking for my own way around when I should have been looking where I was walking. As I started to move to the left of the growing bottleneck of humanity, I stepped on what had to be a rock, or loose pavement where the sidewalk met the grass. My left foot shot out from underneath me and the rest of my body dutifully followed the laws of motion and went right. Instinctively I put my hand out to brace myself against the fall and went down in a heap. I remember walking one moment and lying on the pavement swearing the next.

I got up and brushed myself off, telling everyone around me I was fine, and I limped into the school with what I thought was a twisted ankle and a bruised ego. I got inside and I couldn’t remember what precinct I was supposed to get in line for, so I went and looked it up on the handy town map. For five minutes I stared at the map, and my head was swimming. I couldn’t make it out. Finally I decided to get in what I thought was the correct line, because I heard someone else check in from the same street I lived on. Only problem was they lived on the odd side, I live on the even side and they are two different precincts apparently. So off to another line. My ankle is hurting now, but I’ve had worse. I finally get my ballot and go to the little booth to vote. As I run thru the elected offices, my right hand starts shaking. By the time I get thru the ballot questions, I can’t hold the pen anymore. I get back in line to check out my ballot and a wave of nausea washes over me. I’m thinking…please hurry…please hurry…may have to hurl. Finally I turn my ballot in and head for the door.

Now my ankle is swollen, my elbow is numb and my fingers are getting fatter than usual. I hobble back to the car looking like I’m coming off a three day bender. I am thankful I clipped my keys to my jeans instead of stuffing them in my pocket, but I can’t make my right hand work to turn the car on. I manage to awkwardly reach thru the steering wheel and start the car left-handed. The drive home is three blocks…less than a mile. It takes 15 minutes with election day traffic. Finally I get inside and realize I need to go to the bathroom ASAP. I manage to do that left-handed also. Walking back into the living room I hesitate, but decide to take my coat off now. I’m seriously concerned there may be a bone inside my coat sleeve, instead of inside my arm at this point. But I have to know, so I effortlessly drop my left arm out of its sleeve and use it to pull the right arm out. That was my intention anyway…I got it off, but the pain was blinding. I think I may have passed out for a few seconds. All I know is the next thing I remember is calling Robyn who just sitting down to sushi with Adam at the all-you-can eat place. Neither one of them got all they could eat.

The rest is pretty standard stuff. Painful ride to the hospital. Envious glares at the people who go in for medical attention before you. (seriously… I think that lady totally faked that heart attack) A couple hours of waiting, getting wheeled around, waiting, getting scanned and x-rayed, waiting, and finally going home, still in pain, but slightly less so. The ankle sprain went away in a couple days. The elbow is fractured and the whole arm is painful when I move my wrist. Apparently hands do not make great shock absorbers and all the force of the fall travelled from my outstretched wrist, right along the bone to the elbow until the part that lets the two of them work together cracked. Two weeks later, it still sucks, but I’m dealing with it. Tomorrow the orthopedic doctor tells me where we go from here.

Anyway, that’s why I haven’t written anything recently despite my declaring my intentions to start.

Because I tripped on a rock. On election day.

Democracy is a dangerous business.