an earthly ghost

spewing on my aunt's mental health

she's a hazy grey, numb narcotic;
she's dead inside, her blood pumping;
The chemicals laying thick.
be good to her, be gentle or she'll
get scared: wide eyes soft,
Empty but Fearful.

she's desensitised, she cannot feel;
she's a ghost to the world, travelling;
on nothing but feet.
Protect her and be kind because she;
needs you, your light and
Warmth.

help her to feel again and be soft;
guide her to the safety of day;
Let her see colour.
Let her see the flowers, the sky;
laugh at the clouds - don't you
Let her down.

Reviews

[Invisible Ink]

First, welcome Lana. first, I just thought, what a beauty. Then, I laughed at your profile line. Love it. Then, the titles of you poem drew me it.

This is beautiful. I love the descriptions! "hazy grey, numb narcotic" - which leads the reader back to the title, both are touching, heart-rending, and lovely!

Painful and powerful image... to me, she seems like a zombie (not a Walking Dead type, but the hallow shell type) with the idea of chemicals being her blood and the thing that is keeping her "alive" but not really, because she is "numb" and unfeeling. Lovely sadness!

I love how you end with "travelling; on nothing but feet", incredible line! it blows me away! I just want to go to her and support her tired wrecked body, put her face in my hands.

And the beautiful plea for human kindness and care, almost makes me cry. Truly powerful.

Thank you so much for sharing this. I have no suggestions, because it is perfect and beautiful and complete as is.

[Lana Bee]

wow!! thank you, i appreciate it so much and i'm glad you enjoyed the poem☺️

[Wolf_Lord]

What a way with words you have my dear. This is fabulous. The way you tie the words and images together shows a real talent. I especially liked this: Laugh at the clouds - don't you let her down. I am giving you a hundred on technique. I am not going to grade you on technical, however, I do have a suggestion. Read up on semicolon vs. colon. I really truly loved this. Good Job. Wolf ,'', ^@@^ ,'',

[Lana Bee]

thank you very much!! i'll definitely look up the difference but i'm all about how a poem looks in writing on a page and i think semi colons made sense when i wrote it then? thank you again!!