Fragile Glass

Fragile Glass

A Poem by Poetic Beauty

Submerged within the soul is a deep sigh

Refreshing breath released into the heart

Tension gone leaving an emotional high

 

Chains once imprisoning the heart are broken

Thrown upon the ground signaling freedom

The beast of sorrow’s voice no longer spoken

 

Enveloping tingles travel down the spine

Sliding through the body creating a warmth

Allowing tranquility and peace to combine

 

Rapidly deep tension begins to subside

Leaving the mind blissful with a deep silence

Heartache exiled without a place to reside

 

Succulent harmony encases the soul

Cascading with the rush of a waterfall

Painful restraints broken are a heart’s parole


Mercurial emotions are buried at last

Immersed in an impenetrable chasm

Demolishing the past like fragile glass

© 2011 Poetic Beauty


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The message of emancipation and tone has a nice, positive feel throughout. Also, points for the tight structure, it’s just some of the lines are…odd.

‘The beast of sorrow’s voice no longer spoken.’
(Sorrow’s voice is a beast?)

‘Allowing tranquility and peace to combine.’
(Reads redundant, like saying, rage and anger combine, or sadness and grief combine)

‘Rapidly deep tension begins to subside’
(I thought the tension was gone, according to the first stanza)

‘Succulent harmony encases the soul’
( I don’t follow this description)


I feel the metaphoric take-away of these lines is too vague. They leave the reader puzzled, which isn’t always a bad thing, it’s just that this is a straight forward poem.


Posted 13 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

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OT
such a great flow to this one!! the memories of lovers past! very well written and structured!

Posted 13 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Memories of past love can either be wings or an anchor depending on how we see them... a wonderful piece of writing.

Posted 13 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

This is the best I've seen from you so far Kristina,
lovely sentiments drawn and quartered...Perfect!

Posted 13 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

the heart singing in the light of freedom ~

Posted 13 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Oh this flowed wonderfully...You had me from the first line...you have good phrasing in here. Love the last verse...beautiful told..

Posted 13 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

And so the soul soars up, into bright blue skies, where hope lives and fear cannot find a perch to alight. Wonderful poem from an amazing poetess

Posted 13 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Lovely piece. Strong, hopeful. Excellent last line.

Posted 13 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Great Poem, a story in itself!

Posted 13 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

wonderful, i relaxed just reading it. Well done!

Posted 13 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I love your poetry. Must be read slow and easy or will miss the story and purpose of the poem. This poem is amazing. A emotional ride in your words. The language made the poem a pleasure to read. A very good ending to a excellent poem.
Coyote

Posted 13 Years Ago



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Added on January 16, 2011
Last Updated on January 17, 2011

Author

Poetic Beauty
Poetic Beauty

corn country, IL



About
First off I'm on here to post my writing to have an outlet for my emotions. You will find a variety of poems. If you like take a moment and stroll through this poets mind. Secondly be kind to each .. more..

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