You Are Alive

A Story by Praveen Gola

I freed my face with my hands. Tears were rolling down on my cheeks. I looked towards the clock. It was 9.35 A.M. Only ten minutes had passed which took me in a deep thought.

“Sahib ,a team of some men is waiting for you in the drawing room. I refused them many times that this is not the right time to meet with you but they didn’t pay any attention towards my words. They were saying that they came for some Memsahib”s concern.” Bablu’s choked voice regained my senses.

I freed my face with my hands. Tears were rolling down on my cheeks. I looked towards the clock. It was 9.35 A.M. Only ten minutes had passed which took me in a deep thought and now I felt that I had been here for the last one year. “Ohhhh……that ten minutes flash backed my life so quickly that I forgot all the virtual world. ” I thought and tried myself to be there and accepted that she was no more.

I quickly wiped my face from the handkerchief and nodded my head gesturing that I was coming. Many questions entered into my mind and started to disturb me. “A team of Persons?”,” concerned for HER ?” ………”Who were they?” ……..Why Came at this moment?”…….What they wanted from Me ?” I quickly ran towards the Hall.There was a constant cry coming from the hall. Twenty to Thirty people had already gathered and my father was busy on His cell phone to inform the other relatives.Her corpse was lying on the floor . Neighbours too gathered to console our family members.

The final proceedings will perhaps be completed after one hour as We had to wait for the near and dear ones. A group of five persons that were came from some Hospital was sitting on the sofa set.As I entered, they quickly got up and showed me the Consent form which was signed by my wife in the presence of my Father and Miss Sunita. They had already issued a Card to her on which the registration number is printed and that Card was in my Father’s hand. They wanted to get my consent too as I was the one who had tied the marriage tie with Her.

I was shocked and snatched the card from my father’s hand. I scolded Him that Why He became the witness for such act ? Turning towards the team I shouted ,”

What this hell? Get out from Here.I don’t want to allow you for Organ Donation” Neha is mine……still mine.No one can distribute Her! No one! “. A pin-drop silence persisted and everyone’s eyes were on me. Who Made You a call ? Tell me. Who the hell did invite you here ?

Suddenly a group of fifty children appeared there. They all came from the nearby NGO which was running with Miss Sunita. Miss Sunita came in front of me and admitted that she was the one who informed them about Her wife’s demise . She was the owner of that NGO in which all the physically and mentally challenged children were kept and treated. As Neha was a social worker so also joined this NGO and a part of it but I never thought that such NGO’s also convince the human beings for this organ Donation Act so I harshly looked towards Her but as She was innocent so was facing my cheap mental thoughts in an easy way.

I shouted towards her,” I warned Neha many times still your wickedness worked. Seriously If One helps You then You people ready to snatch them.” Suddenly I lost my control and fall on the ground. Bablu ran towards me and advised to keep calm. Being a patient ,too much anger was bad for me. Miss Sunita handed over an envelope to me and sat on the floor with Her team.I opened the envelope…..There was a letter inside which was written by Neha. I started to read the same.

My Dear Sunil,

Sep 3 ,2013

I never thought that one day I had to write an undelivered letter for You. But this is all the demand of the scene as I am expecting now my demise very near. I know you very well.You are an angry man and couldn’t bear my words directly.So this is the safest way to express my wish in front of you. Please allow the doctors immediately for their work. If You really Love me ……then pay Me Homage in this way.They all came from AUMS hospital for my organs and need your consent. Miss Sunita has been just a messenger of my demise but its all because of my wish.No one can force the other one for organ donation.But As you know I want to Live always with You so this is the only way to get closer to You after my death too.

I looked towards the team as they were expecting my affirmation .Mr. Shyam ,who was the most senior of them came towards me and asked to sign the consent paper as early as possible so that they can get the most delicate parts without any delay.I took the paper from His hand and signed.Neha’s letter has immediately changed my mentality which was overpowered on me from the last 10 minutes. Perhaps ……Her words in the letter were sprinkled with the magic water that changed my mindset too. I sat on the sofa and start reading again.

Sunil……I love you very much but for the last three years was unable to pour the same which you deserve .You cheered me a lot. It is fate that I had to leave you in the middle of this Journey but this all is pre-decided and no one can deny for the same.

Neha was suffering from the Heart disease.She had a Heart Attack two times earlier and today was the third and the last attack which made me alone. Perhaps She judged the symptoms earlier yesterday and called Miss Sunita in the late evening on the pretext to change Her mood.I allowed for the same without judging that Her company would be the last for me .Oh…..She was a lady who was so suppressed by my anger that made Her unable to express Her last wish in front of me at the last moment too. Perhaps I made Her coward so She opted this way of Letter writing to express Her wish in this Modern world.But She was a brave lady.She never cared for her life but cared for others.She always wanted to give more and more to this society . Sometimes I passed lewd comments on Her, “Hey…..The sister of Daanveer karna……Look this is Kalyug. Here nobody cares for your nice acts.Life is a business Here”. But she didn’t pay attention towards my words and smiled.

I want to live with you ever and forever till you survive. I know you are like an innocent guy who didn’t look after yourself. Have You remembered that Card fight? That was the “Organ Donation Card” which I wanted to show you but your angers made me to hide it and I simply converted the same into a shopping mall credit card.

I remember that night when Neha was offered to show me some Card but I made her words silent after stating that I was not eager to hear her rubbish stories. Perhaps She was trying to get the permission for this noble cause as she knew that I was from the very beginning opposed to this act of organ donation after the death as I was to one of those persons who believe that the person who donate his organs in this birth will be the one who born without those particular organs in the next coming birth.But Neha always laughed on my such narrow mentality and always advised me to change it while discussions.

Sunil……Babli needs eyes and you know when she will look this world with them then that will be the most precious day of my life. Look at Rohan…….He is suffering from one kidney failure and living on dialysis. His parents can’t afford the expenses now so left all decisions upto GOD. Rinky’s burnt skin is unable to tie her future in some marriage bond. Perhaps my skin will make Her beautiful as you know that every second man needs a beautiful wife . My single life can save the eleven person’s life and you are the lucky one who can feel me in those eleven Human beings. Please think …..that why We waste all of them in a futile burning when they will be benefited to others.

I quickly turned towards the group of fifty children who came here to console me. Babli,a fifteen year old was very much attached with Neha. She was sitting in a deep shock without knowing that Her aunty has left the best gift for Her life. Rohan was too in deteriorating condition but never forget to come because of Neha’s Love. Now I thought myself to be mere coward in front of them who was demanding Her corpse too but they all were the real Lovers who came Here without any motive . I took out a cigarette from my pocket and started to blow. Yes,I was a chain smoker…Neha always tried to stop me saying that she wanted to die as a married one.But who knows that her wish will be accepted earlier than me. Perhaps good souls always deserve the best they want. I again started coughing as the doctor advised me to stop all that stuffs due to some infection in my lungs.One of my lung was already damaged more than eighty percent and there were very less chances to recover the same. Bablu came near to me and took that cigarette from my hand . I kept quiet as at that time the Hall was fully crowded and very soon we had to carry the funeral of Neha. To relieve from that tough situation I again myself hide into the words of Neha.

Dear not only Babli and Rohan……my gift is for you too.You know that doctor advised you earlier to replace your damaged lung but that time you didn’t take that seriously and facing the difficulties. But now Mr. Shyam will change it and please don’t ruin my lungs. I hadn’t touched tobacco in my life . Perhaps my lung will make your will power strong and you will leave the cigarette smoking forever.

That word of Neha broke me completely and I moaned in a shrieked way. A gift for me too……..made me completely shocked. All my near and dear came closer to me to console me. Dr. Shyam was about to leave so He came near to me and ordered me to immediately come into his clinic after one hour so that my lung will me replaced with my beloved. Soon the funeral started. There was no disfigurement of the body and it was looking normal. So an open casket funeral was done. People were wrong in many perspectives on this organ donation concept but everything was normal except the great act which my wife did.

After completing the funeral proceedings , I went to Dr.Shyam’s clinic. He immediately transplant my Lung with Neha’s one. Babli, Rohan, Rinky and many others were the lucky one who got Neha’s gift and were happy of this kind act. I too was the same who got my wife’s wish completed only through this letter otherwise I never allowed anyone for this act. Suddenly I remember the unfinished part of the letter which was in my pocket.I quickly took it out and start reading again.

Sunil…….I Love You very much.You are my soul and I didn’t want to separate myself with you at any cost.Whenever You feel alone,depressed,inattentive,frustrated then do follow these simple steps that make you cool .

Look into the Eyes of Babli ……..

She is the one who soothes You ,

Look at the Rohan’s smile ……..

He is the one who regains You ,

Look towards the Rinky’s beauty ……..

She is the one who adores You ,

Look into Your Heart ,

Took some fresh air inside ,

Feel the world’s magic ,

That will the magic that I am leaving For You.

Your’s Neha,

sep 2,2013