Boundless Love

Boundless Love

A Poem by Rick Puetter
"

To my life's love, Rosalinda

"

Digitalis purpurea, also known as foxglove or lady's glove. Clinically used to

treat heart failure, in large doses it is a deadly poison.

 

 

'Twas when we both were young
that spirits from above,
did seemingly
conspire with fate
to instigate our love.

 

And fleur Digitalis,
with petal sweet and rare,
did line the walk
with stately stalk

our pathway to prepare.
 
For in that flowered spring,
I first did know my heart,
then did my soul
on seeing you
from sorrows first depart.

 

And when we were made one
and vows exchanged that day,
I knew at once
we'd e'er enjoy
love's most complete bouquet.

 

Bonded firm together,
our fortunes melded now,
I held your love
above all else,
this paradise enow.

 

And time can ne'er erase
our love forever true,
each passing day
in every way
our union grows anew!

 

And when in sickness, love,
your life did threaten end,
I steeled my heart
we ne'er could part
these sorrows we'd transcend.

 

Uttermost devotion,
has bound my heart to thine,
I can not breathe,
I can not live
with out you being mine!

 

I can not look on thee,
and not remember love,
and ere I'd be
bereft of you,
I'd taste of grave foxglove!

 

Bloom of purple flower,
protect my true love's heart,
for if it fails
the world is lost,
my soul full rent apart.

 

And so each waking hour,
I pray this love to keep,
my hand in yours
emotion stirs
and through my heart doth sweep.

 

Thank thee, holy spirits,
for blessing all my days!
For gift of her,
I do aver,
forever, I'll sing praise!

 

And looking back at life,
when final rest doth call,
I'll comfort me
just knowing that
to me she gave her all.

 

 


©2008 Richard Puetter
all rights reserved

© 2018 Rick Puetter


My Review

Would you like to review this Poem?
Login | Register




Featured Review

Why Rick, I think you've outdone yourself! I'm a big fan of your deep, philosophical and clever works, but your passion and love just spills over in this work - it's rare to see that kind of emotion so well-wrought and nicely executed! I absolutely loved the foxglove theme - you covered all aspects of the flower: its beauty, its sentimentality, its medicinal purposes and even its use as a poison. This was wonderfully clever and it really brought the poem together in a fantastic way. Your imagery was great too - and heightened wonderfully by the inclusion of your picture; good choice! The rhyme scheme was really creative too - I'm sure it was incredibly hard to follow at points, but you did a wonderful job with it. A few of the rhymes did feel a little forced (more on that later) but you can easily fix these places and otherwise the flow was quite natural.

I have some small critiques, though. Forgive me, but years of reading too much Shakespeare and Milton have given me a rather good eye for proper archaic spelling and usage, so I have a few corrections to make. The apostrophe in "'Twas" is in the wrong place. As you well know, apostrophes take the place of missing letters, so the apostrophe actually goes in front of the "t" to replace the letter "i" of "it." (This is a fairly common mistake; it's not like most people go around writing with the old spellings of English much! It adds a really nice demension to this particular poem, though, so I'm glad that you used it.) Likewise, the "apostrophied" version of "never" is actually "ne'er" - the apostrophe stands in the place of the missing "v." Also, I believe in the lines "we'd ere enjoy" you're using the wrong "ere." That form, (the unaposrtophied version) is actually an archaic term for "before," which doesn't make sense with the line. What you're looking for, I think, is the clipped form of "ever" which is spelled "e'er" (again, the apostrophe replaces the "v.") It makes much more sense in the line "and ere I'd be..." however.

The lines "for did my soul,/on seeing you/with sorrows first depart." are very sweet but also a little confusing. It gives the impression that your soul is departing WITH sorrows, i.e. departing from you and and taking all your sorrows with it. I think this confusion could be changed if you simply changed the "with" to "from," because then your soul would be departing from sorrows, which would make a bit more sense given what you're saying. Similarly, the line "And when we first made one" confuses me. When you first made one what? Do you mean when you first WERE made one? To me that would make more sense, since the stanza goes on to speak of vows, which generally implies marriage. In the stanza after that, the line "my paradise enow" rhymes, but since "enow" is an archaic form of "enough" it's a little hard to grasp; it feels like it needs more explaination - "my paradise enough because...". Perhaps you could change the "my" to "this," for "this paradise enow" and it would be more clear.

The line "And time can not erase" feels a little lopsided rhythm-wise, since it's only six syllables as opposed to your usual seven and the meter is a little off. I realize that you use six-syllable opening lines a bunch of different times within the poem, but this one sticks out to me for some reason. I can't really justify your changing it, but I thought I'd just point it out.

Personally, I think it just looks better for the word "cannot" to be one word. If there's a space between the "can" and the "not" it makes it feel a little strange because you have to wait that milisecond for your brain to process the negation, so I always think it's stronger to use "cannot" whenever possible. That's just a personal preference thing, though. Same goes for "without." I think it's just because I'm so used to seeing them as compound words that it becomes strange to see them apart.

To me, the lines: "and ere I'd be/bereft of you,/of needs I'd taste foxglove!" are the most powerful lines in the poem, but sadly right now I think they're also the weakest because it's the hardest to get at your meaning there. It think it's just the wording that's confusing, though, and that's easy enough to fix. "Of needs I'd taste foxglove" sounds strange and doesn't make a lot of sense on its own, although I see what you're trying to do: "before you'd die I'd poison myself because I can't live without you." Might I suggest that you replace "of needs" with "I'd must needs taste foxglove"? "Must needs" is an old idiom that essentially means "must necessarily" and it implies that something is incredibly necessary. I think it would fit your purposes and style quite well, while simultaneously clearing up the line. Hurrah!

I'm a stickler for this, but the line: "I'll sing forever praise!" sounds hollow to me just because of the diction -it feels to me like you came up with the line solely for the sake of the rhyme scheme (even though it DOES for what you're saying quite well and I can see where it makes sense). The inversion of words just doesn't ring true to me in this case because it doesn't really make any grammatical sense - it would be so much easier to say "I'll sing praises forever," except that wouldn't fit your rhyme scheme. What about "Forever I'll sing praise?" Still not 100% perfect, but it makes a little more grammatical sense, at least.

I also think the poem is a little over-punctuated; you pretty consistently have a comma after most of the lines in your stanzas, and the commas aren't always necessary. I would recommend freeing it up a little by revising the punctuation - which poems do you need and which don't you need? I think it would give the work a much freer feel.

Wow, that was long. Please don't be disheartened by my long string of critiques - most of them are very minor spelling and grammar things which are very simple to fix. Nothing at all in your general scheme was the least bit out of place, so only a few specific lines require reworking. All in all, this is a fantastic piece; just the way a love poem should be written: interesting, original, well-worded, passionate and clever. All of your strengths were clearly combined in this, and you did a fantastic job. It takes a lot for something to get onto my favorites list, but this clearly makes the grade. Well done!

Posted 15 Years Ago


6 of 6 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

Very beautifully written! I liked how you tied in the Foxglove flower, great job!

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

This is quite beautiful, full of grace-- your soul would have thrived in England from the late 16th to the early 19th centuries.

Posted 7 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

beautiful and deep write! the rhyme is wonderfully crafted! well done! :)

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Beautifully written! There is such a graceful flow in your words. Truly lovely piece :)

Posted 8 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

this poem is stunning and so uplifting..heartwarming really..full of love and passion..true love..everlasting..beautiful..

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

One word, Rick: EXCELLENT!

Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

This is amazing now that i re read it i probably should have gave you higher then runner up haha.
Its so romantic, so touching, so sweet, the rhymes are great, so filled with emotion, and very well put together.
I love the whole story line, sounds like real true love, its beautiful.
VERY VERY NICELY WRITTEN :)
ENJOYED THIS POEM VERY MUCH!


Posted 10 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

I love this! Great word choices, rhymes and rhythm. Your emotions pour forth without being maudlin. Great poem, Rick.

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

This is amazing, good luck :)

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

This is tremendously deep and sweet!! I feel extremely honored that you decided my contest was worth your entry into it!! (if that last part made sense haha)

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.


First Page first
Previous Page prev
1
Share This
Email
Facebook
Twitter
Request Read Request
Add to Library My Library
Subscribe Subscribe


Stats

2572 Views
37 Reviews
Shelved in 2 Libraries
Added on July 20, 2008
Last Updated on March 30, 2018

Author

Rick Puetter
Rick Puetter

San Diego, CA



About
So what's the most important thing to say about myself? I guess the overarching aspect of my personality is that I am a scientist, an astrophysicist to be precise. Not that I am touting science.. more..

Writing